


The handler - Loki fanfic

by ilse_writes



Series: Loki & Ylva alternate universe stories [1]
Category: Loki - Fandom
Genre: Agents of SHIELD, F/M, Fluff, Memory Loss, Native Americans, SHIELD, Ylva as a SHIELD agent, alternative universe, casino - Freeform, hint of smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-13 12:01:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17487689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ilse_writes/pseuds/ilse_writes
Summary: Ylva Frederikson is a SHIELD agent; her most important task is keeping an eye on Loki Laufeyson, the infamous God of Lies. It turns out to be one hell of a job, especially when Loki shows up in her apartment in the middle of the night, acting not quite like himself.





	The handler - Loki fanfic

**Author's Note:**

> This is another Loki & Ylva story that plays out in an alternative universe. No coffee shop here! In this alternative universe Asgard is still there and so are Odin and Frigga. New York and the Chitauri army did happen, any other events from later movies did not take place.  
> Again: this story is not related to the Coffee & Books storyline. This is just me having fun, writing about Loki and Ylva in different scenarios. Enjoy!

**Part 1**

 

The doorbell rings. And immediately for a second time, longer now. I groan and push the blanket off me. Putting the tv on pause with the remote, I push myself off the couch. The doorbell rings again, two short rings and a longer one. "Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," I grunt out before a coughing fit stops me in my tracks.  
The person on the other side of the door has no regards for my ill health and rings the doorbell again. The building may better be on fire as an excuse for this doorbell-behaviour! I open the bolts, stifle another cough and open the door to my unwelcome guest. Shit. I should have brought my gun. "What are you doing here?!"

The God of Mischief has his hand on the doorjamb, finger over my doorbell. He looks me up and down, taking in my disheveled state. It's quite the clash with his leather armour in black and green. "SHIELD called for me, I'm here. That's kind of our thing, isn't it?"

The rich timbre of his voice finds its way to my lower stomach, as it always does. I sigh deeply. "I'm pretty sure the message said to report to headquarters," I argue, holding the door and the doorpost to block the entrance. And to hold myself up. That too. "Barry is waiting for you at HQ. He'll brief you this time."

Loki stares at me for a second before he brushes my arm out of the way and walks past me in to my apartment. "Does Barry have a death wish?" he asks casually, looking back over his shoulder.

Most of my brain cells have been replaced by snot and mucus. "No?"

When I keep standing there with the door in my hand, Loki takes a couple of steps back and reaches past me to close the door. "Do  _you_  want Barry dead?" It's an honest question, he is really only inquiring.

"No!" Another coughing fit overtakes me and Loki quickly steps out of range.

"Then don't put me in a room alone with Barry," he states simply. "You are my handler, Wolfgirl. Handle it."

It's always Wolfgirl, or Little Wolf. Never Ylva or Miss Frederikson, not once in the last two years. Pretty sure I introduced myself with my full name though, not the old Norwegian meaning of my name.  
"I called in sick today, in case you had not noticed," I call after Loki, who walks into my kitchen like he comes here every day; instead, it has only been a handful of times.

"Oh, I noticed," he replies airily, opening up cabinets in search of who knows what. "You look like shit."

"Thanks," I mutter sarcastically. Still, I try to push my hair out of my face and I straighten out my T-shirt. It has the SHIELD logo on it and it goes great with my unicorn rainbow pajamas pants.

Meanwhile, Loki has put the kettle on and he is waiting for the water to boil with his arms crossed, leaning against my kitchen counter. "Well?"

"What, well?" Snot and mucus instead of brain cells over here.

"The briefing?" He looks at me pointedly.

"Barry..." I start.

"Barry..." Loki mimics me. "Come on, Little Wolf. You're usually not this slow."

"I'm sick!" I protest, though Loki isn't fazed. I can feel myself give in already. I could call HQ, call Barry, make them come get the God of Lies out of my hair. Yet that would take time, almost as much time as it would take me to log in on the secure server and brief Loki myself. Scenario 1 would piss  _him_  off, scenario 2 would possible only piss  _me_  off. You don't want to deliberately anger a demi-god from Asgard, so scenario 2 it is. He is here now anyway. I stomp off to my bedroom to get my laptop, even though stomping off in fluffy socks doesn't make that big of an impression.

I put everything I need om my table: laptop, smartphone, fingerprint pad. It is quite the hassle to get into SHIELD's secure server from home and I have only just put in the last of six passwords when Loki walks up to me and puts a large mug on the table next to my laptop. It's my 'Keep calm & drink tea' souvenir from London; I bought it when I was on a mission overthere. The God of Mischief leans over my shoulder and spoons some honey into the steaming tea. I blink at the large mug, watching how Loki creates a little whirlpool in it with the spoon. He has made me tea with honey. The prince of Asgard has made me tea. The sexy thorn in my side has done something nice for once.

"Thank you," I say softly, glancing up at him. Loki is standing right behind my chair, one hand resting on the backrest. In his other hand he is holding his own cup of tea: another large mug with a sassy quote. His says: 'Too hot to handle'.  _Of course_  he picked that one.

He barely acknowledges my thanks. Instead, he nudges his chin at the laptop screen. 'What've you got for me?"  
I explain the mission to him. Loki is one of our stealth operatives, one of our best actually. He can be a real pain in the ass to work with, as he is very demanding and he's condescending to almost everyone. Loki had gone through three different handlers before Fury assigned him to me. Or me to him, depending on how you look at it. I was mad about it at first: I'm a field agent and being someones handler is mostly a desk job. The director was adamant however and he pointed out I have the perfect skill set to handle an on edge God of Mischief.   
I am what they call a mutant, although I hate that handle. I prefer to consider myself a human with something extra. In my case the extra is an extremely relaxing aura. Everyone in my vicinity feels better, more relaxed. I usually shield off to some degree, because it's not that good for productivity if you're exposed to it for a longer period of time. Imagine doing a mission with every agent in chill mode! It comes in pretty handy in combat though: if I get my hands on you I can relax you into unconsciousness within seconds.

I don't shield off around Loki and he knows that. He's less affected by it anyway, I think; I've never put my hands on him to try, so I'm not sure. Either way, he has put up with me - and I with him - for a good two years now. I know the do's and don'ts around him. Do: keep your wits about you. He  _will_  trick you, however harmless. Don't: lie. It seems like a paradox: don't lie to the God of Lies, but he really  _hates_  being lied to. The same goes for withholding information, that's a no go.

"The Seneca Niagara Resort & Casino," Loki reads from my laptop screen. "Oh, fun! A casino!"

I groan and let my head fall back, remembering the last time Loki's mission took him to a casino. The top of my head touches Loki's leather chestpiece, but I'm too worn out to care; he can take a step back if he wants. "Please, don't rig the slot machines this time," I groan. "The paperwork on that one still haunts me in my dreams."

He smirks at me, looking down. "You dream about me, Wolfgirl?"

See? This is what I mean. He is so full of himself! Handsome as hell, with a voice that can coax your panties down, but so cocky! And never to be fully trusted. Although that last part isn't really true, I know he'll have my back in the field when necessary.  
I jerk my head upright, giving myself a fresh rush of headache. Great. "Nightmares, Mr. Laufeyson, nightmares," I answer curtly, running a hand through my hair.

Loki chuckles, yet he is all business again when we walk through the plan one last time. It's nothing he hasn't done before: infiltrate, steal a memory card from a businessman who is associated with Hydra and pull out without anyone noticing.

"There is a Quinjet waiting for you in..." I check the time on my screen. "Ninety minutes."

Loki puts his cup down on the table and clasps his hands together. "Great! And what are we gonna do in that time?"

I whirl around in my chair, almost elbowing him in the gut - or lower. "Excuse me?"

He ignores me and almost skip-hops over to my couch before he lets himself fall down on it. "What were you watching?" He hits a button on the remote so the tv screen comes to life again. "Orange is the new black? Oh, I know that one! It's about the ladies in prison, right?"  
When Loki looks up to me he sees me staring stupidly at him. He has been at my place before, sometimes we had work to do outside office hours and I didn't want to go to the office for a ten minute briefing. However, those were always short visits. Nothing that went on longer than drinking a cup of tea. And now his teacup is clearly empty.  
There's another surprise waiting for me when the God of Lies opens his mouth again. "You don't mind me hanging around here, do you?"  
He is actually asking for permission! He smirks at me, resting an arm on the backrest of my couch. "I could go to HQ and wait there, but, you know... Barry."

"Yeah, yeah, don't want to get Barry killed." I doubt it if Loki even knows who Barry is; you have to be at least an Avenger to get the prince of Asgard to call you by name. We have worked pretty closely for two years and all I get is a nickname.

"Besides," he continues cheekily, "I haven't seen you in, what? Four weeks? We have some catching up to do!"

All right, there's gonna be an Asgardian prince on my couch for the next hour and a half, let's just roll with that. It's not like I have it in me to kick him out anyway; I just wanna curl up under a blanket and watch my series. I close the laptop and get up from my chair. "Sure, we'll catch up. It's been eight weeks tomorrow by the way." I hold up his tea cup - mug - to him. "Another?"

"Sure!"

When I get back from the kitchen with our tea - with honey for me - Loki has made himself comfortable on my couch. The blanket that was lying there in a heap is now neatly folded hanging over the backrest and he has put his feet up on my coffee table. Before I can open my mouth about that, I notice he has taken off his boots; the image of Loki's socks shuts me right up. I put the tea on the coffee table and nestle in my corner of the couch again, propping up some pillows. I have another coughing fit and Loki hands me the box of tissues that has been sitting on the floor next to the couch without a word.

"Has it really been eight weeks, Little Wolf?" he asks after I have put the tissue box away.

"Tomorrow, yes, but who's counting?" I reply with a sigh. I'm pretty tired and this whole thing is just plain weird.

"Apparently, you are," is Loki's witty reply. I can only shrug and lean further back into the pillows, too tired to play games. The God of Mischief notices and holds up the remote. "Shall we?"  
At my nod, he presses play. Other than an occasional remark or question about the show, Loki is quiet. He actually seems content to sit on my couch and watch the show. Odd.

With him on the other end I can't completely stretch out and after a while my right hip is starting to get uncomfortable. I have hurt it some years ago, when I was still a rookie at SHIELD, and sometimes it acts up when I lie in the same position for too long. Besides, my couch has seen better days, it's getting a bit lumpy. I change positions and try to find a better seat. I can't, Loki is in the way.  
He looks up from the screen when I accidentally bump my toes into his hip. "Am I in your way?" he asks with a slight smirk.

"Yes! Uh... no, not really." I still could use some more functioning brain cells.

Loki arches one of his eyebrows and then he resolutely picks my feet up and plants them in his lap. "Better?"

"Uh..." I am sure this is not exactly appropriate behaviour. Are there protocols about watching tv with your handsome colleague from outer space? Loki doesn't seem to care anyway, he just resumes watching the episode. With all that leather padding he probably hardly feels my feet upon his legs. And I am actually really comfortable like this. All I need is my blanket and I would doze off to sleep in seconds. I am a bit weird like that: cover me up and I can sleep anywhere, sick or not. Maybe it's a good thing the blanket is still hanging over the headrest; falling asleep with the God of Lies in your house is probably not the best idea...

 

***

 

When I wake up, it's dark in my room. The tv is off and through my window I can see the sun has set. I pull my blanket a little higher and stretch out. I feel a little better, my headache is gone.

Wait.

Why am I sleeping under my blanket? Where is Loki? I jolt upright, wide awake all of a sudden. My apartment is silent, apart from the soft hum of my refrigerator.

I slide silently off my couch and inspect my apartment, stopping by my bedroom first to get my gun out of my sock drawer. With my weapon drawn I check every corner of my one bedroom apartment. No sign of the prince of Asgard, except for the two tea mugs in my sink.  
I check the clock in my kitchen. It's 8 pm, meaning Loki is in Niagara Falls by now, or at least, he should be. My front door has the deadbolts on it, which indicates Loki has teleported himself out after locking my door. That's actually really considerate of him, maybe even more than letting me sleep and pulling a blanket over me.

While I heat up some soup for a late dinner I check in with Barry. "Hi, it's Ylva. Just wanted to check if everything is going according to plan."

"Agent is in position," Barry answers routinely. He is probably checking the monitors, like I would be doing if I had not called in sick today. "Hey, did he give you a reason why he didn't came into HQ for briefing?" my fellow agent asks curiously.

"Nope," I answer, letting the p pop. "He was just being his usual self."

I can almost hear Barry shake his head disapprovingly through the phone. "I don't know how you can stand to work with him!"

"He can be a hand full, yes," I admit. "But it's not that bad, really."

"If you say so," Barry replies. "I guess we'll see where he shows up for debriefing."

"Hehe, I guess so. Bye!"

 

**Part 2**

 

It's the middle of the night when I wake up from a sound. At first I don't know what it is and I almost turn over again when I hear it a second time: a slight scuffle in my living room. I slip out of bed and grab my gun; there is someone in my house! For a second I think it could be Loki, returning from his mission, yet this isn't his style. If he wanted to scare me in the middle of the night he would have just appeared at the foot of my bed to see my reaction.

In my shorts and T-shirt and with my gun drawn I move along the wall to the door of my bedroom. As always, that door is not fully closed. I can see no movement, not even when I switch to the other side and carefully push the door open a little further. Not seeing anything or anyone means I will have to leave the safety of my bedroom. I take a deep breath and count to ten in my head. The door is still partly blocking my view, so I'll have to take a chance.

In a whiff I'm outside my bedroom, my back against the now closed door. That is one safe room; now I have the kitchen, my bathroom and the hall to cross off. The living room in front of me looks empty, unless someone hid behind the couch. With my weapon ready I sneak along the walls, making my way to the kitchen. It's hard to see in there, as the only window in that room looks out at a narrow alley, letting hardly any light in from outside.

It all goes so fast I hardly register what happens. One second I turn into the kitchen, the next I'm flying through the air because someone grabbed my gun hand and threw me up over his shoulder. My weapon skids across the floor, though I am not yet fully disarmed. My training kicks in and I manage to pull my attacker out of balance in my momentum. He - he's larger and heavier than me, I'm sure it's a guy - stumbles only momentarily before he moves with me and we both roll over the floor. My attacker has gained the upper hand again and has me in a choke hold from behind. Instead of trying to rip his arm away from my throat I reach further back to grab his face or neck. As soon as I feel skin I open up the floodgates, pouring as much of my powers into my attacker as I can. This should take him out in seconds, yet it doesn't. He does loosen his arm a bit to try and get my hands off him, but he can't without letting me go completely. My nails dig in his skin as I try to hold on with all my might. This  _has_  to work!

And it does, after maybe the longest minute of my life. My attacker slumps to the floor and I scramble to my gun as quick as I can.

With my gun cocked I hit the lightswitch. My attacker is lying face down on the floor. He has long black hair and his armour in black and green leather is all too familiar. What the hell??

In my work bag I have some zip tie cuffs. I put them on Loki, hands behind his back, even though I doubt they will restrain him long. I did it just in time; he starts moving again.

With a suppressed groan Loki wakes up. He tugs a little at his bound hands before he pulls his knees under him and sits up that way. Loki's hair hangs in his face and he whips it back before he looks at me.

"What the hell, Loki?!" I call out, the gun trained at his head.

"You know me?" He squints his eyes at me.

"Of course I know you, you asshat!" I gesture angrily at him with my weapon. "Why did you attack me?!"

"My name is Loki, not asshat," he angrily throws back at me. Then he suddenly looks insecure. "Isn't it?"

This is too ridiculous, I can't help but start laughing.

"This is not funny!" Loki growls at me. "Why are you pointing a gun at me if you know me?"

"Because you broke into my house in the middle of the night!" I pull my gun up to aim at his head again. I don't know what this is, if it is one of his tricks he really invested in this. He truly looks a bit lost with the way his eyes flit across the room.

"I didn't break in," he says defensively. "I was just... here." He looks around him as if to see what 'here' is.

"What do you mean?" I ask him confused. "You teleporting in here counts as breaking in, even if you didn't literally break my door!"

Now it's Loki's turn to look confused. "I teleported?"

I shrug. "Guess so. The deadbolts are still locked." I point to my front door, which we can see from here; my apartment is not that big.

"I teleported?" Loki is looking at me like he can't believe me. And I actually believe  _him_. I never saw him like this before and I have seen him work plenty of missions in the last few years. I've seen him shapeshift and lie like it was nothing. He was always in control, not like now, not like this. He hasn't even tried to get rid of his cuffs, which should be easy for him: he could just magic his hands out. Or use brute force; those Asgardians are stronger than humans any day of the week.

"Loki? Are you all right?" I think I know the answer from the way he's looking at me. "What happened? How did you get here?"

"Why should I tell you?" He might be on his knees with his hands bound behind his back, yet Loki still manages to convey the message with indignation.

"Because I'm your handler, you're supposed to tell me if something is wrong." I lower my gun because there  _is_  something wrong here. Oh no, what if I messed with Loki's brain by using my powers on him?! "Loki, what is the last thing you remember?" I urge him.

"You mean before you attacked me?!" he huffs, whipping his hair back again.

"To be fair, you attacked me first," I point out.

"Says the one with the weapon," he replies sarcastically.

"Well, you should know better than breaking into someone's home!" This is getting us nowhere and I sigh. "Seriously, Loki, what is the last thing you remember? Do you know what happened before I knocked you unconscious?"

"I wasn't unconscious," he denies heatedly. "I was just... paralyzed. Don't do that to me again!"

Okay. Now I know what my powers do to demigods. Interesting. But that doesn't clear up what happened here. I explain to Loki I'm only trying to help him and that it's really important to figure out how he got here.

He frowns and seems to think hard. "There was a bear. He was chanting something in a language I couldn't understand. Next thing I know, I was here and I heard you cocking your gun in the other room." He stares accusingly at the weapon in my hand.

"You saw a chanting bear and then you were here?" I ask incredulously. "Seriously, Loki, what have you been smoking?" He just stares at me angrily, but I can see other emotions too. Fear. Confusion. The God of Lies never shows those emotions. What the hell happened to him?! "You don't remember anything else? Do you know who you are? Do you know where you are?"

He hesitates for a second. "I am Loki and I am in your home. That's what you told me."

"You don't remember anything else?" His green eyes look up at me so helplessly my heart breaks. "Oh honey..." I whisper softly and I put my gun away. I crouch down next to Loki before I remember I'll need a knife to remove his cuffs. I put my hand on his shoulder. "Are you gonna free yourself or do you want me to grab a knife or something?"

"How am I supposed to do that? he asks, turning his head to me.

"I don't know? What do you usually do? Magic the cuffs away? Pull them apart?"

Loki looks at me like I've grown two heads. Then he starts fidgeting with his bonds, before he forcefully pulls his arms apart, knocking me over from my crouch in the process. He is swift to his feet, extending a hand to help me up. When I'm standing too he doesn't release my hand. Instead, he looks me up and down and I can feel myself to start blushing under his gaze. "Are we lovers?" he suddenly asks, startling me.

"What? No!" I swallow hard. "No, we're not," I repeat more kindly. "Why would you think that?"

"You called me honey," he replies simply. "Are we friends, then?"

I nod slowly, kind of regretting my slip of the tongue a moment earlier. "Sure, I guess we're friends. Friends from work."

"And I have been in your home before?"

"Yes, a couple of times. You were here only yesterday, I briefed you for your mission." I realise Loki is still holding my hand when my phone suddenly rings. "Excuse me," I tell him and I pull my hand away to walk over to my bedroom to answer the phone.

On the other end of the line is Barry's exasperated voice. "Please tell me that bastard came to you for debriefing! The comms went out for a minute and then he was suddenly gone! Poof! Vanished into thin air!"

"Calm down, Luschek," I urge him. "You're rattling." Loki has followed me as far as my bedroom door and he seems tense, intently following my conversation. "Was the mission finished?" I ask my colleague.

"Yes," Barry answers, still sounding peeved. "He got the memory card. He still has it."

"Check your pockets," I tell Loki and he obediently starts to pat down his clothes.

"He's with you?" Barry asks.

"Yep," I answer absentmindedly, following Loki's movements with my eyes. He's searching his pockets like they're someone else's. "Showed up a minute ago."

"In the middle of the night?!" Barry sounds both angry and relieved.

Loki holds out a memory card to me, retrieved from an inside pocket of his long leather coat. I take the card from him. "I've got the memory card. Mission complete. Do you mind if we continue this in the morning?"

"Yeah, sure," Barry agrees quickly. "Good luck with Agent Asshole. Good night."

After disconnecting the call I stare at the phone in my hand. Barry was only mad Loki disappeared on him, he doesn't seem to think there was something off. Which means that it - whatever  _it_  is - happened during the time the communication channels didn't work. Maybe they were jammed? No matter what happened, it was serious enough to mess with the God of Mischief.  
Loki is leaning against the door jamb, fidgeting with the lapels of his leather coat. He reminds me of a lost puppy. "What am I gonna do with you?" I sigh.  
He looks up at me with sad eyes. The real Loki would have made some innuendo right now. This one hasn't even commented on my pajamas and the amount of leg I'm showing. "Right. Tea first. And then I'm gonna make a call." I have to take charge and kick this as high up the tree as I can.

When I have installed Loki on my couch with a cup of tea I leave an urgent encrypted message about a compromised agent for deputy director Hill. Not five minutes later I get a text that she'll be here in fifteen minutes. I quickly change into jeans and a T-shirt; I'm not gonna face my boss in my pajamas.

"Who's coming?" Loki asks when I sit down next to him.

"Our boss," I explain. "Or, technically more my boss than yours. You are working on some sort of freelance basis, I guess."

To give Loki a sense of what is coming I explain to him what SHIELD is, what he does for SHIELD and what his mission was last night. He takes it all in, tensing up more and more with every tidbit I give him. Loki looks so unhappy that I put my hand over his, giving a little squeeze. "It'll be all right. We're gonna figure out what happened and how to get your memory back."

He nods slowly, his lips pressed together and his eyes focussed on our hands on his knee. I would have pulled my hand back again, but Loki is holding on to it like it's a lifeline. In the back of my mind I'm still entertaining the possibility that this is all fake, that Loki is tricking me. However, my gut tells me that is not the case; I have never seen him this lost.

A firm knock on the door startles us both. I get up from the couch to open the door, yet Loki grabs my hand again. "Wait!" he says quickly, "I... I don't know your name."

The realisation I forgot to introduce myself makes me smile. "It's Ylva. Ylva Frederikson," I tell Loki, pressing his hand.

I open the door not only to Maria Hill, but also to director Fury. "Sir! I didn't mean to call you out of bed for this," I apologize when he walks past me into my apartment.

"If an agent like Loki gets compromised, sleep is the last thing on my mind," Fury replies stonily. "The last time he was not completely in control of himself he brought the entire Chitauri army upon New York!"

"Fair enough, sir. But I don't think that is the case now," I answer politely.

Hill and Fury stand in my living room, facing Loki who has gotten up from the couch. "Well? What is the problem here?" deputy director Hill asks, looking Loki up and down.

The God of Lies seems to be at a loss for words for once; he looks at me pleadingly. I step forward so I am between both parties. "Loki... uh... he seems to have lost his memory," I explain. "He doesn't know who he is. I think he even forgot how to use his magic."

"Well, I'll be damned," the director exclaims after a few seconds of stunned silence. "Are you sure this is not some trick of his?"

"I'll let you be the judge of that, sir," I answer. "But I would not have called Miss Hill if I didn't think something was wrong."

"Let's see what's wrong exactly, shall we?" Hill invites Loki to sit on the opposite side of the table. She has a recorder and lets Loki tell her exactly what he remembers, multiple times. His story stays the same every time: a bear who chants foreign words and then suddenly finding himself in my living room.

Fury chuckles when he hears about our scuffle in the dark. "You paralyzed him, huh? Good to know for future reference."

Loki crosses his arms in front of his chest. "As long as I'm not on the receiving end in the future. I don't want to repeat that experience." He looks so offended that I can't help but laugh. That gets me an annoyed glare, yet when I keep laughing silently Loki just sighs and rolls his eyes.

We don't get any wiser from Loki's story, so now it's my turn. Hill has pulled up some reports from her laptop. "You briefed Loki last night, right? Why does it say agent Luschek's name here?"

"I called in sick yesterday, Barry was supposed to cover for me. I guess Loki didn't get that message." I look pointedly in Loki's direction when I say that, though he doesn't remember what he did and only looks back at me questioningly.

My story is not very different from Loki's. The only thing I can add is that the mission went okay and that Barry only panicked because he lost Loki. "He was pissed, but I don't think he knew something went wrong."

"All right," deputy director Hill says. "We'll have to get everyone debriefed thoroughly in the morning." She closes her laptop. "For now, I think it's best to keep this under wraps." She looks over to Fury who nods in agreement.

The director has his eye on Loki the entire time, something that makes the God of Mischief uncharacteristically nervous. "Right, let's get out of here. Maybe we can get some shut eye before the sun comes up," Fury says, getting up from his chair. "Loki, you coming with us? We can get you a bed at HQ."

Hill and Fury walk to the door, yet Loki stays put. He is just standing there, unable to keep his hands still. "I'll stay here," he says suddenly and looks at me. "If that's all right?"

This is the second time in 24 hours he asks me if he can stay, this day could not get any weirder. "Yeah, sure, why not?"

Fury shrugs. "Suit yourselves. We'll get a message out to Thor, but I don't know if we can reach him. Guy still refuses to get himself a cellphone."

"You don't happen to know a way, do you?" Hill asks me and Loki.

Loki only shakes his head and I have to say no too. Unlike Thor, Loki does have a phone; one with magical reception, always four bars, even on Asgard. When I need to call him in for a mission I can send a text. I have no idea how to reach the God of Thunder, I only have a hotline with his younger brother. Loki would probably know how to contact Thor quickly, if he was in his right mind.

But the isn't and right now he is looking expectantly at me. We're alone again and the clock says the sun will be up in little over an hour. "I don't have a guest room, you'll have to sleep on the couch," I tell Loki and I get him a pillow and a blanket from my closet.

He takes the pillow from me and squishes it between his hands. "Thanks for letting me stay here," he says quietly.

Loki, the lost puppy. "Sure, no problem. Try to get some sleep. I'll do the same."

 

**Part 3**

 

I've changed into my pajamas again, though sleep seems very far away. After a half hour of staring at my ceiling, not even bothering to get under the covers, I give up; I'm not going to sleep this night anymore. I hear some quiet sounds in the living room every now and then, so I'm guessing Loki is not asleep either.

And indeed, he isn't. He looks up when I open the door, his face lit up by a streak of light coming from the kitchen. He has made himself tea and just like yesterday he has his socked feet up on the coffee table. His leather coat and chestpiece are hanging over a chair, leaving him in pants and some sort of undershirt. "I'm sorry, did I wake you?" he asks worriedly.

I wave it off and flop down beside him on the couch. "Nah. Couldn't sleep anyway. You?"

He shakes his head. "Do you want some tea too?"

"No thanks, I'm good." Loki has pushed the coffee table a little back to accommodate his long legs, so now I can't reach it comfortably to put my feet up. Instead, I pull them up on the couch, slouching down so my head is against the backrest. Loki has done the same and we quietly stare into the semi-dark.

"So... I'm guessing your powers entail more than just paralyzing people?" Loki asks after a while.

"You can feel it?" I ask curiously. The real Loki never let on I have any effect on him. I only assume I have because he lets me stick around longer than any of his other handlers.

"Yeah, I think so. It's relaxing."

"Yep, that's me," I chuckle lightly. "The human chill pill." I turn my head to look at him. "I can shield off, if you want. I usually do around people, it can get too much after a while."

Loki looks at me from the corner of his eyes. "Too much?"

"Let's just say not much work would get done if I'm in the office at full blast," I smirk.

Loki smiles. "I see. But you're not at work now, right?"

"Well..." I think out loud. "You're here. I'm your handler. That makes it kind of like work. But I never shield off around you anyway."

"No?" Loki turns his head to me now, clearly interested.

"Nah. You never really showed signs of it affecting you. This is the first time you ever said anything about it."

"Really? I wonder why that is." Loki rubs his chin in thought.

"Beats me," I shrug against the couch. "The mind of the God of Mischief works in mysterious ways."

"Maybe I secretly enjoy it," he answers thoughtfully. "It feels nice."

I laugh softly. "You're welcome, I guess."

Loki suddenly puts his hand on my arm. "No, really, Ylva, thank you. Thank you for letting me stay and..." He suddenly looks a little shy, which is a really weird look on the God of Lies. "Well, I feel less anxious with you around, so that helps too."

It's odd to hear him call me by my name, not to mention to have him thank me like this. Oh, he is often polite and courteous to me - he is a prince, after all -, though never this personal.

"It's okay, Loki. I'm happy to help."

We fall back to silence after that, each immersed in our own thoughts. Although, I'm not thinking that much to be honest. What is there to think about at 5 in the morning? It's all confusing anyway. Loki is the one to break our silence, only to pull the blanket over my legs. "Here, you'll get cold."

"Thanks." I pull the blanket up to my chin and lean my head back again. I can just as well stare at the ceiling here and wait for the day to start.

 

***

 

I don't know what I register first: the fabric of his shirt under my hand, or his firm chest underneath it. It could also be his smell; stormy, if that's a thing. As soon as I fully realise I'm snuggled up against Loki's side, I shoot upright. "Shit!"  
Loki is awake now too and when he lifts his arms over his head to stretch himself, I realise his hand has been on my leg; leaving a void now that it's gone. I push myself to the far end of the couch, which isn't very far. "Well, this is embarrassing," I mutter, rubbing my face with my hands to wake myself up.

"What is?" Loki asks cluelessly and I don't think he fakes it.

"This," I grunt, motioning my hand in the space between us, a space that certainly wasn't there mere moments ago.

"You fell asleep on my shoulder, what's embarrassing about that?" he shrugs. "I'm glad you got some sleep. That must be a magic blanket, you were out in seconds."

I grimace. This was a little more than just sleeping on his shoulder, this was downright cuddling. "Please tell me you weren't awake the whole time."

Loki yawns. "I wasn't."

After a quick shower - not together, Loki waits until I'm done and dressed - we head downstairs to the coffee shop at the ground floor of my apartment building for a quick breakfast to go. We both carry a large coffee into the subway station. I usually stick to tea, but I can certainly use the caffeine this morning. Loki seems less affected by the lack of sleep, one of the perks of being an Asgardian demigod. I feel like crap, though that could be more due to my nasty cold than the missed hours of sleep.  
Nobody looks twice at the God of Lies in his leather armour on the subway; the people of New York are used to the oddest of things. "I think there is a change of clothes in your locker at HQ," I tell Loki.

The train changes tracks and I have to hold on firmly to the railing next to me; I don't want to bump into Loki, there has been enough touching already if you ask me. I've always found Loki attractive and now his annoying, cocky personality has melted away it is certainly harder to ignore that fact. In the past there were always snarky remarks or his 'I do what I want' attitude to remind me of who I am dealing with. Now I have a very demure Loki at my side, following me like a puppy through a city that is unknown to him. He still knows how to function as a person, he just doesn't remember who or where he is. Lots of insecure factors for him to deal with, I should think.

When we arrive at the large building that is SHIELD's New York headquarters, we encounter a little bump in the road: where is Loki's badge? To prevent getting any unwanted attention I pull Loki into an empty restroom to search his pockets. We finally find his badge, tucked away in one of many, many pockets in his long, leather coat.

"Ylva? Why do we have to keep it a secret what happened to me?" he asks curiously, putting his coat back on.

I turn back to him with the doorknob in my hand. "We have to know what or who we're dealing with first. You are a master of magic, Loki. You have a certain reputation around here."

"And you don't want them to see what has become of me." Loki's shoulders slump forward.

What is it about this Loki that he works on my feelings so well? Damn it. "It's not that. It's just... you're different now. And people might panic if they see someone has gotten the better of you."

Or who knows what kind of reactions people might have when they see Loki this vulnerable. It's been almost a decade since the attack on New York and we know Loki was being controlled back then, yet there are still people who harbour resentment - or worse - towards him. It's one of the reasons he's working for SHIELD; it's a way to work his 'debt' off.

"How different am I, Ylva?" he asks, turning his badge over and over in his hands.  
I start laughing.  
"That different, huh?" Loki grimaces.

"Let's just say you usually act a lot more cocky," I tell him, still laughing. "And I have never heard you using my name before."

"What did I call you? Miss Frederikson? I can do that if you prefer!"

"You always called me Wolf girl, or Little Wolf. Ylva is fine, Loki." I open the door. "Come on, let's find you some clean clothes and then we're gonna find out what happened at the casino yesterday."

With his badge we can go through security and Loki follows me to the locker rooms. He's lucky the lockers open with fingerprints; I don't think he would remember his combination for the lock. Like I had thought, there is a set of clean clothes in his locker, as well as some books. He even has pictures stuck to the inside of the door; how very human of him. Loki stares at the photographs. He points to one of him and the God of Thunder. "This is Thor, I think?"  
I nod, sitting down on the bench in the middle of the locker room.  
"There's one of us too," Loki says, tracing the picture with his finger. "It looks like we're at a fancy party."

"I'd sometimes go as your date, if needed. Undercover," I explain. "I think this was at a charity gala, some time this year."

"Beautiful dress," Loki comments.

"Yes, you conjured it up for me." I quickly get up from the bench. "Come on, get changed! When we get you your memory back these trips down memory lane are no longer necessary."

Loki doesn't react immediately, he keeps looking at the picture. "You think I used Little Wolf or Wolf girl as an endearment?"

I quickly step into the hall and close the door to the locker room behind me; we're not gonna have that conversation. Especially because I remember how Loki had reacted to the black dress I originally planned on wearing to the charity gala. It was a bit conservative maybe, though I figured that was okay because we were working anyway.

_"You're not gonna wear that," Loki stated._

_"Why not?"_

_"Because you're going with me," he smirked. "And I want to show you off!" A green flash and a weird tingle all over my body and suddenly I was wearing a gold sequin dress that hugged every curve in a very, very good way. Loki smiled appreciatively. "Much better, my little wolf. Much better."_

An agent of SHIELD was undercover as a photographer at the event and he took the picture of us. I have a print too, in a box in my drawer, along with other pictures from work. It was a fun mission, we even got a dance in - Loki insisted on it - before it turned into business. And business ripped the dress. To Loki's credit, he didn't make any inappropriate jokes or remarks when he found me straddling an unconscious man with the split in my dress ripped up all the way to my stomach. He expertly changed our outfits to tactical gear and tossed me a gun from one of his infinite pockets. The picture is a nice memento from that mission.

Loki steps out into the hallway in one of his bespoke black suits, his long hair bunched up at the back of his head. Great. Like I needed more distraction.  
"Lead the way, my lady," he says with a small bow.

First, we swing by Miss Hill's office. She instructs us to go over all the data from last night's mission. "Maybe something triggers your memory, Loki," she says kindly. "If not, we must hope that we have footage of what happened."

"And what do we tell agent Luschek?" I ask, knowing we will have to go to Barry next, he's the communications officer on duty.

"Keep everything on a strict need to know basis. Tell agent Luschek only what is really necessary."  
Before we leave the office, deputy director Hill calls me back and hands me a new badge. "You've leveled up, Miss Frederikson," she says with a smile. "I want you to lead the investigation."

I check the badge. Not one, but two levels up. Wow! "Thank you, madam!"

"Call me if you need anything."

Loki happily follows me down the hall to our next stop: debriefing with Barry. "So, how do we do this?" he asks curiously. "How are we gonna fool Barry?"

"By saying as little as possible, I guess." I wonder if we will be able to pull it off. "You don't like him, so not talking to him fits the bill."

"I don't like him?"

"No, and he doesn't like you either." I nod to the door on our right, our destination.

Loki opens it for us. "He doesn't?" Then he spots Barry, who is looking at Loki with a sour face and he turns back to grin at me. "He doesn't."

"You have some nerve!" Barry Luschek is clearly very angry with Loki. "You had us all standing there with our dicks in our hands. And for what?! Just so you could wake up yet another agent for your own amusement?!"

Loki isn't fazed, or he is good at faking it. "You can put your dick away again. I'm here now, aren't I?"

"Guys, shut it!" I intervene before Barry can react. I explain to Barry we will have to run through the whole mission minutely. Of course he wants to know why, but that is where my new badge comes in.

Loki leans back against a file cabinet while Barry shows me the files on his computer. "We don't have a lot of video footage because the casino is on Seneca land," my colleague explains. "Our jurisdiction there is limited."

"Just show me what you got," I tell him and inauspiciously move my chair over a little bit. Unfortunately Barry is quick to get into my personal space again, as always. He does his work well and you can count on him in the field, but I would like him better if he kept at least a two feet distance at all times.

The video footage shows Loki go inside the casino, wearing a suit like he does now. Other images show Loki in the main room, playing some roulette. Barry skips to another bit. "He should be here somewhere too, but Mr. Magic shapeshifted and didn't tell me." Loki just shrugs at the vile in Barry's voice.

I check the image and point to a corner of the screen. "There, by the doors. Same walk."

Barry just huffs and closes the window at the screen. "All we have after that is some audio. Nothing really interesting."

"Let me be the judge of that, all right?"

"Sure, you're the boss, with your new badge and all that." Barry flips the badge on my lanyard up with a smirk.

"Don't be an ass, Barry," I mutter. I already went through a box of tissues this morning and if it were up to me I'd crawl back into bed. However, there are more pressing matters at hand. With a sigh I put the headphones on to listen to the audio. The communication between Loki and Barry last night was minimal. I listen to the God of Mischief's voice confirming he has located his target and about twenty minutes later he confirms he has the package. Everything else is just casual conversation with the people around him and the staff of the casino.

I lean forward on the desk to support my head while I listen to the audio with closed eyes. Concentrating is a bit hard, so I try to filter out the two men in the room with me. Barry is listening in too, keeping a headset pressed to one of his ears. He has his eyes on me instead of the computer screen and I try to ignore that.

After starting the audio tape for a second time, I suddenly feel a hand on my shoulder. Loki leans in and puts a large mug in front of me. Tea with honey. I mouth my thanks and Loki holds up his own cup of tea to me in response. No sassy quotes on these cups, only the SHIELD logo. Loki must have found his way back to the break room we passed on our way here. When Barry roughly shoves his chair back, I realise Loki has not brought him a beverage. Loki smirks as Barry stomps past him with a scowl on his face.

I listen to the tape three times without getting any wiser. Loki listens to it too, but he hears nothing that jogs his memory. I pull my headphones off and rub my temples. "Barry, was there anything different from other jobs? Anything at all?"

"It's Loki," he sneers. "He does what he wants."

"Did he do anything you particularly didn't want or expected him to do?" I've got a nice headache building up and my voice is strained.

"Besides shapeshifting and not telling me?" Barry frowns at Loki, who has pulled up a chair for himself and observes us from the other side of the room. "He didn't go out the exit we agreed on," he says. "He went to the back after he got the memory card, even though he knew our mics didn't have reception back there." Barry explains to me they shortly lost contact with Loki, before they located him in a back room. There was movement and they expected him to exit through a side door, yet he never came. "We did a scan and he had just disappeared. That's when I called you."

"How long had you lost sight of him?"

Barry shrugs. "Ten minutes, tops."

I turn my chair back and forth, resting my eyes on Loki. "So, what did you do in those ten minutes?" The prince of Asgard gives me a slightly apologetic look: he doesn't remember.

"For all we know he double crossed us! That memory card could be a fake," Barry says accusingly. Loki frowns at him, though he doesn't say anything.

"No, that memory card checked out. Miss Hill has it," I explain.

"Then why go through all this trouble?" Barry stares at me in wonder. "The mission is completed. Case closed."

Yes, and a new case wide open. "I'm gonna need access to the security tapes of that casino," I think out loud.

Barry huffs. "Good luck with that. The Seneca tribe is no fan of SHIELD."

"We'll see about that. Thanks for your time, Barry." I get up from my chair and Loki is already by the door, ready to leave.

"Always a pleasure, Ylva," Barry says with a broad smile, ignoring Loki.

Out in the hallway my headache really washes over me. Loki gives me a worried look. "I think you should go lie down for a bit. I can give deputy director Hill an update and ask her about those casino security tapes."  
My head hurts too much to argue. I direct Loki back to Miss Hill's office and find myself an empty bunk bed in one of the bedrooms by the locker room.

 

 

 

**Part 4**

 

The deep timbre of Loki's voice by my ear slowly wakes me. I roll over and open my eyes, only to find his face mere inches from mine. I immediately freeze, though hopefully he doesn't notice that since I'm buried underneath the covers.  
"So, you're a top bunk girl, huh?" he asks with a smile. Loki rests his chin on his arms, leaning on the rail of the top bed.

"Only because some guy once fell on top of me when I was in the lower bed," I explain with the blanket still pulled up to my nose. "He didn't see me in the dark, he thought the bed was empty."

"Ouch," Loki grins. "That's a tough way to wake up."

"I like this better," I whisper before I can stop myself. Seriously, I've got to get myself in check! This is Loki, the God of Lies and Mischief, a demigod and above all someone I  _work_  with. I should not be thinking about how nice it is to have him around like this, to see more of him than just the special agent who only comes in for a job.

Loki pretends to not have heard my last remark. "How are you feeling?" he asks instead.

I think about that for a moment, considering how I'm feeling. "Better, the headache is gone. I could sleep some more though..." I push the blanket down to my waist and sit up. "Can't sleep while I'm on the clock."

"Sorry about that," Loki says, pushing himself away from the bunk bed by stretching his arms. "If it weren't for me, you would probably be at home, in bed."

"Maybe," I shrug. "Or maybe something else would've come up."

"Maybe," Loki replies with a half smile. "Right now, it's Thor who is asking for you."

"Thor is here?" I grab my jeans from the foot of the bed.

Loki nods and goes over to the door. "He came about an hour ago. I'll wait for you outside so you can get dressed."

Meeting Thor is quite the experience. You'd think I'd have met the guy before, working for SHIELD as his brother's handler, but the opportunity never presented itself.  
"Lady Ylva, at last we meet!" Thor grabs my hand in his large hands. "My brother always speaks highly of you." He leans over to whisper in my ear, though Thor's whisper is anything but quiet. "And you must be very special if you can put up with him."

"I can hear you, you know," Loki scowls from behind his brother.

Thor shoots him a grin before he looks back at me. "Is he giving you much trouble?"

"Apart from having to figure out what happened to him?" I shake my head with a smile. "No, he is actually quite nice like this."

Thor laughs heartily at that and invites me to come sit with him. They have cleared one of the break rooms for him and Thor puts his large body down on one of the couches. I knew he was big, but this big?! Loki is as tall as his brother, but Thor is almost double as wide. His biceps are easily as big as my thigh. Impressive!

Loki takes my arm before I can join Thor. "Was I really that bad before?" he whispers urgently at me. I guess it's really bugging him.

I nudge his shoulder playfully. "You think I'd still be working with you if that was the case?"

"Don't worry about the past, brother," Thor assures him jokingly from the couch. "It's more important that she'll still like you  _after_  you get your memory back again."

I sit down across from Thor. "So you believe it too? He really has lost his memory?"

Thor understands what I'm getting at. "My brother is a trickster, though he'd sooner make a fool of other people instead of himself. However, there is a chance he has brought this upon himself."

"Can you people stop talking like I'm not in the room!?" Loki glares from me to Thor. "I'm not a child! This is horrible enough as it is."

Both Thor and I apologize at the same time. It's hard to imagine what this is like for Loki. He still has his wits, yet his memory is only a little over twelve hours old at this point. Everything is new, everything is insecure. It stresses him out, he's constantly fidgeting with his hands.  
Loki sits down on the armrest of the couch I'm sitting on, his elbows on his knees and his hands gripping the back of his neck. Thor explains to him SHIELD will do anything they can to help clear this up. "Something strange went down, not even Heimdall saw what happened to you." The God of Thunder leans forward. "Let me take you back to Asgard, you might feel better at home."

"What, in a place I have no memory of?" Loki keeps his head down. "I might as well stay here. Hell, Ylva's house is more familiar to me right now than Asgard."  
There's a painful silence when Loki stops talking. What do you say to someone who doesn't remember his home?

"I'm pretty sure Asgard looks better than my tiny apartment," I pipe up in a lame attempt to lighten the mood.

Loki sighs and straightens his back. "Your place is fine, Ylva. Your couch has known better days, though."

"I can't argue with that," I chuckle. "Maybe I can get a new one now I've gotten a promotion."

"At least there is one good thing that has come out of this," Loki says in a strained voice. His hair has come loose from the bun and he ties it back again while I try not to stare at him. I blow my nose in a tissue for the millionth time today to distract myself. I should not stare at the way his shirt spans his chest when he reaches back for his hair. Should. Not. Stare.

"Lady Ylva, can you please tell me what happened last night? My brother already told me of course, but I'd like to hear your side of it," Thor asks and I start to tell him everything I know.

"We need to find out what happened in those minutes SHIELD had no eyes on Loki," I conclude my story.

"And  _why_  I went to the back," Loki adds. "Luschek was right on that one: I had no reason to go there."

"Luschek?" Thor asks curiously. "Oh, agent Butt-check? I don't think I've ever heard you call him by his real name before." The big guy laughs at our confused faces. "Never mind, you don't like the guy, that's all," he says to Loki. "Something to do with..." He stops and looks from one person to the other. "You know what, never mind! There must have been a reason for you to go to the back in that casino. Maybe the other exit was blocked, or someone was with you?"

"I didn't see anything like that on the video," Loki answers. "You, Ylva?"

"I don't think there was anyone with you, though we could have missed something. There wasn't much to begin with anyway," I reply, thinking back to what I saw this morning. "I didn't pay much attention to the other exit, might be worth looking into."

"I bet it is some sort of spell," Thor says suddenly, looking at Loki. "You're not hurt, everything seems normal, you just don't remember anything that happened before you teleported to Ylva's living room."

The God of Mischief nods in agreement. Thor rubs his hand across his beard. "I wonder why you showed up there, of all places."

"I have a theory about that," I offer. I explain how Loki had come to my apartment in the afternoon, because he didn't want to be briefed by Barry. And how he had stayed to hang out for a bit before it was time to leave. "You locked my door from the inside, so I guess you teleported yourself out. What if the spell sent you back to the last place you teleported from?"

"You didn't see Loki out?" Thor asks.

"No, I fell asleep. Loki didn't wake me when he left." It sounds weirdly intimate if I say it out loud like this. "I was sick," I add defensively.  
Thor just shrugs and doesn't seem to think anything of it, like it's normal for a handler to fall asleep while watching tv with their charge.

At that moment the door opens and two people walk in; I quickly get up from my seat. "Director, Miss Romanoff," I greet them. I have worked with the Black Widow in the past, before I became Loki's handler. She mostly operates alone, though there is always a team on stand-by. Much like with Loki, yet Black Widow is even more of a solo artist.

"Mr. Laufeyson, I'd like you to have a word with Miss Romanoff," director Fury says. "That's you, son," he adds with a grin when Loki looks a bit confused. "Miss Romanoff is very good at uncovering information, I bet she can help you remember more."

Natasha Romanoff flashes a pearly white smile. "Shall we, Loki?" She gestures for him to follow her. He does, after a short glance at me and Thor. I've got an uneasy feeling about this, which is totally uncalled for, isn't it? We're all playing for the same team here.

After checking that Thor and the director don't need me, I go find a free workstation to do research. In my email I find the needed letters to request access to the security footage of the Seneca casino. I guess deputy director Hill made them after Loki told her our own data wasn't decisive.

I'm not big on tribe laws and the Seneca natives, so I'm gonna do some research first. I don't want to accidentally step on any toes when I'm going to ask them for access. If they don't like SHIELD, I probably gonna need to sweet talk them a bit to coax them into cooperating. And who knows, maybe Thor is right and Loki has brought this upon himself by rubbing someone the wrong way. What if that someone belongs to the Seneca tribe? I need to know more first, so I can handle this the right way.

The next couple of hours I scour the internet and our files for everything there is to know about the natives of the Seneca Tribe. It's really cool to see how much cultural elements are represented in the architecture of the casino, both inside and outside. One of their tribe animals is a bear, maybe Loki saw a statue of a bear inside, or even a stuffed one. That might explain the jumbled memory of a chanting bear.

I also check the video footage again. There is some casino security by the door Loki was supposed to use, which could explain why Loki took a different exit. However, he is not one to be intimidated by a couple of humans, no matter how big and burly they may look. Besides, I have no indication that they know Loki isn't there to play roulette. He's always very careful about that. Loki is a bit like a magician, he's distracting you in plain sight so he can do his tricks without you noticing it. Look here, because the real thing happens over there.

I decide I will have to go over to the casino to talk to people and get a look at the situation. After a long phone call with lots of waiting and talking to at least six different people I have an appointment with the chief of security of the casino for the next day. I'm not gonna snoop around before I know how far politely asking will get me. I arrange for a Quinjet and a small team, just in case.

After being cooped up with a computer for most of the afternoon I'm totally ready to call it a day. There's a reason I prefer to work in the field: I hate sitting at a desk for hours at a time. I want to go outside.

I wonder where Loki is. I haven't seen him since he went with agent Romanoff. Surely they are done by now? A quick search of the building gets me nothing: no sign of Loki, Thor or agent Romanoff. And I'm not gonna ask the director where they are. I do run into Barry, who is on his way out. He hasn't seen Loki either. "Thor did that annoying Bifrost thing. I swear, the lawn is never gonna be green again," he complains to me.

"Thor went back to Asgard already?"

"Yeah, talk about a lightning visit, huh?" Barry smirks. "And for all I know Loki went with him."

The pull in my stomach is worse than it should be. Would Loki go home without telling me? Who knows, maybe Black Widow triggered his memory and he is back to his 'I do what I want' ways. Meanwhile, Barry is still talking to me. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I thought maybe we could get a bite to eat? I know a good Chinese restaurant nearby." He looks at me expectantly as we swipe our badges to leave the building.

"Uh... I better go home. I'm still not feeling too well, you know?"

Barry seems to be a little disappointed, though he tries to hide it. "Oh, yeah. Better turn in early tonight."

"Right. See you later, Barry!" I quickly turn left before my colleague can suggest we take the same train home. There's only so much Barry I can handle on a day. Depending on how often we see each other at work I get at least one half-assed try at asking me out a month from him. It's always casual enough to be mistaken for just two co-workers who get a drink together, but I'd only go with him if we go with a group. I've caught him checking out my ass or chest too often to think this would be a casual get together. He is most certainly not my type!

No, apparently my type is tall, dark-haired and moody, because my heart flutters in my chest when I see him.

I live in an old but decent apartment building and my door is at the end of the hall. There is a window there, with a sticker of a vase with flowers on the glass, the colours starting to fade. We can't have a real plant on the windowsill, because that window is also the fire escape. And underneath that window is Loki sitting, his long legs stretched out in front of him. He keeps his head down, his long hair falling in front of his face. He doesn't look up until I crouch down in front of him. If he hasn't been crying already, he's certainly not far from it. He looks totally miserable.

"All I could think of was coming here. The girl who pointed a gun at my face last night is the one person that feels the most safe. Pathetic, huh?" Loki's voice is rough, laced with hurt.

My heart fills and runs over. I stand up and pull my key out of my pocket. "Come on in, let me make you some tea."

The lost puppy follows me to my tiny kitchen. While I put the kettle on he opens his mouth several times to say something, yet he thinks better of it every time. He looks hurt, lost and immensely sad. I want to make him feel better with every fiber of my being. And then I realise I literally can.

He startles when I slide my arms around his waist and press myself against his chest, though he is quick to close his arms around me. I don't move, I just let myself be there for him, giving off my powers in a steady flow.  
My powers would work without hugging and a hug alone might make him feel a little better too, though I follow my gut on this one and do both. We're standing in the middle of my kitchen, arms around each other, until the kettle whistles.  
I'm a bit reluctant to let him go, though I know I should proceed with caution. We may have crossed a line here, yet that doesn't mean all of my common sense is overboard. I still know who I am dealing with here.

When I hand Loki his steaming cup of tea - I gave him a mug with 'I love NY' on it - our eyes lock for a moment. "Thank you, for everything," he says in that deep voice of his.

My stomach flutters again and I realise I am falling for him. Oops.  
"You want to talk about it?" I ask as calm as possible. "Or would you rather watch some tv or something?" I need to do something else before I hug him again, this time purely for my own pleasure.

"Tv sounds good," Loki answers after a short pause. "I can use some distraction."

Good. Me too.

"You have a nice home, Ylva," Loki says when he sits himself down on the floor with his back against the couch. With his fingers he pulls lines in my deep-piled rug. "It's... cosy."

I settle in my usual spot on the couch, a little behind Loki. "You actually said that before, though I think you meant tiny instead of cosy," I chuckle. "Want to watch Orange is the new black again?" I put on the episode during which I fell asleep the other day, Loki doesn't remember it anyway.

It's not before his tea is finished and the second episode has started, that Loki tells me what happened this afternoon. "She was brutal," he says. "At first I thought she only tried to find out if I was faking it, but it was more than that." He turns his empty cup over and over in his hands. "I convinced her I'm not a fraud, yet she kept on pressing. She told me things..." He shudders. I put my hand on his shoulder and give a little squeeze. "I just had to get out of there. The only thing I could think of was coming here..."

I flush a nice shade of red at his last words and I'm happy he is still staring ahead at the tv-screen. Get a hold of yourself, Ylva!  
"Natasha has a very special skill set. She's smart, cunning, a lot like you actually, although I guess you need your memory for that," I explain kindly. "I can imagine there are questions about your current situation. After all, you  _are_  the Trickster."

Loki turns his head to look at me. "You believe me though, right?"

I brush some imaginary dust of his shoulder to avoid his gaze. "Yes, I do." I feel like those green eyes stare into my soul. The silence feels awkward, heavy, so I quickly fill it again. "Natasha probably tried to trigger your memory, pushing you like that."

Loki sighs deeply. "If all she has told me is true, I'm a monster." He puts his arms around his knees to rest his chin on them.

I scoot forward to the edge of my couch so I'm right next to him, my upper leg touching his shoulder. "You're no angel, Loki, that's for sure. However, you're not the devil either."

"I've killed people..." he says, staring ahead. Orange is the new black is still playing, though neither of us watches the screen.

Sweet talking ain't gonna pull him out of his funk, so I'm gonna try the bold approach. "People... humans, frost giants, dark elves... the list is pretty long," I say lightly. Loki slowly turns his head, as if he can't believe what I'm saying. "You are over a thousand years old, honey, and you were raised in a realm of warriors. There's bound to be casualties."

Loki stares at me for a second before he leans back again and stretches his legs out. My leg pushes against his shoulder and I have to restrain the compulsion to run my hand through his hair.

"How can you be so calm about this?" Loki asks. "All this, I mean," he adds, gesturing wide with his hands. "I show up in your living room in the middle of the night with a serious case of amnesia, apparently I'm some sort of almost-evil god with magical powers... and you just take it all in stride!"

I chuckle. "I could have shot you the other night, would that be better?"

A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. "No, drinking tea and watching tv with you is the preferable option."

"I would have thought so!" I scoot back against the backrest and use the remote to rewind the episode a little before I press play again. He can say I am calm, but he doesn't see or feel the turmoil inside me. Turmoil caused by his presence.

"You called me 'honey' again," Loki says casually, watching the tv-screen. "That's twice now." When I don't answer - biting my tongue and feeling all kinds of embarrassed - he chuckles.

 

**Part 5**

 

We order pizza and watch the remaining episodes of the season of Orange is the new black. It's almost like I'm having a friend over - a normal friend, not the prince of Asgard who forgot he can be a pompous prick too -, we eat our pizza slices, comment on the action on screen with our mouths full... It's an ordinary thursday night. And I love every minute of it.

Loki makes me tell about missions we did together in the past couple of years. Of course he wants to hear about the night I wore the gold sequin dress, but I also tell him about the many Hydra compounds we - he - infiltrated and dismantled.

"So... deflecting to Hydra wouldn't be an option?" Loki asks with faked innocence while he grabs the last slice of cold pizza.

I lean over to take a bite from the offered slice before I answer. "Ha, no! You're ranking pretty high on Hydra's we-hate-your-guts-list."  
Loki eats the rest of the pizza slice and stacks the two empty boxes on top of each other. I watch him from my spot on the couch. He looks so normal. I guess without his magical powers he is still no ordinary guy, though without his memory of his thousand-plus years life he comes pretty close.

"You're staring at me," Loki says, nudging my leg. He's still sitting on the floor and he leans back so his head rests against my knee. "What do you see?"

"I was just thinking how normal you are like this," I answer honestly. "I wonder if you will remember all of this when you get your memory back."

One corner of his mouth pulls up in a half smile as he looks up at me. "I've asked myself the same question... I hope I do."

"I hope so too." Our eyes lock and I wish I knew what he is thinking. I'm dangerously close to throwing all my inhibitions overboard when it comes to him. Yet there is also my more practical side, my trained side. "We'll have to wait and see," I say, breaking the eye contact. "Meanwhile, let's hope we can keep this quiet. Who knows what will happen when word gets out the prince of Asgard can't use his powers?"

The prince in question sits up again and turns to me, pushing my legs a little to the side so he can lean his arm on the couch. "You think there could be danger?"

I shrug. "Depends. But I wouldn't be a good agent if I didn't take it into account."

"Are you gonna protect me?" Loki smirks, pushing playfully at my hip.

I push back at his shoulder, sticking out my tongue. "Isn't the gentleman supposed to protect the lady?"

"Oh, I will, my lady," Loki says in a tone that goes straight to my gut.

Sucking back my breath I jump up from the couch in the next second. I need some distance! Loki easily moves out of the way, smiling knowingly. "This lady is going to bed," I tell him quickly. "I'll get you a pillow and a blanket."

In bed I lie awake for a while, staring at the door. Behind that rectangular piece of wood is the God of Mischief, sleeping on my couch. I keep trying to remember he is a demigod, a warrior prince whose tricks and lies have earned him many a nickname. If I'm being honest with myself, I already liked him when... Well, when he was still the God of Lies. Okay, he can be a pain in the ass to work with, but at the bottom line he gets the job done. He may trick the agents he works with, yet he never puts one in real danger. At least, not while on the job. That one time he made the game 'the floor is lava' a bit too real, Barry ended up with first degree burns on his foot because he wasn't fast enough. I remember thinking hard to come up with yet another excuse to not go for drinks with my persistent colleague, when I was suddenly hoisted up on the air hockey table next to a joyous Loki who declared the floor to be lava. And the next moment it was, making the agents in the break room flee for safety. After the initial shock everybody started laughing. Everyone except Barry, who was furious about his melted shoe. However, he didn't file an official complaint and Loki repeated the game a couple of times after that. It was not until director Fury unexpectedly walked in and saw a bunch of his agents perched on top of every piece of furniture in the room - I was standing on the windowsill, barely holding myself up from laughter - that the game was banned.

Loki drove his other handlers crazy and at times he does it to me too, yet in a way he always makes up for that. If only by behaving perfectly well on the next job. I always had a soft spot for him and now, with his bad boy image literally forgotten, I've got a serious crush on Loki. I groan into my pillow when I think of all the things that are wrong with that. Relationships at work are not forbidden, however, they are certainly not encouraged. And then there is the tiny fact that he is from another realm. Oh, and about forty times my age, even though he doesn't act like it.

At some point I fall asleep and I dream about Loki. It's nothing special, nothing overly romantic, he is just  _there_. And it feels good, so good.

I wake up a little before my alarm, which probably has something to do with the knowledge I have a guest over who's sleeping in my living room. Scratch that. Make that  _sleeping in my bed_! He is asleep, facing me, one arm shoved up under his pillow, the other somewhere under the blankets in the small space between us. I've got a feeling that I'll be touching him if I only move an inch. Loki slowly opens one eye. The green iris focuses on my face. "You're staring again," he says sleepily.

"You're in my bed!" I state accusingly, yet I'm not moving to kick him out.

"I asked permission first," Loki replies airily. "Remember?" He has opened both eyes now.

"No, clearly not," I reply with a frown. I really don't remember him getting in my bed somewhere during the night. You'd think I would!

Loki shrugs and moves to his back, pushing his hair out of his face before he looks back at me. "That couch was killing my back, I don't know how you can sleep on that thing! Between your bed and the floor, I figured I could at least ask you." Then he chuckles. "You gave in almost immediately, are you that used to sharing your bed with a man?"

Now I  _do_  sit up and give him a shove. "No! Is your memory back? You're definitely back to your mischievous ways!"

Loki laughs again and throws the covers back to get out of bed. "Sorry, still don't remember," he says and smirks at me. "I'll make breakfast to make it up to you. I slept wonderfully by the way." He steps into his pants and winks at me.

Loki leaves the room and a moment later I hear him rummaging about in my kitchen. I'm still staring after him with my mouth open, realising I spent the night in bed with Loki, who was only wearing his boxer shorts and a T-shirt.  
Maybe I should start shielding off my powers; he is way too comfortable around me! The idea of shielding off in my own home doesn't sound appealing, yet I don't want to kick Loki out either, even though I know it's dangerous to have him around like this. Dangerous to my heart, that is. Shielding off and still risk I will jump his bones sooner or later or kick him to the curb? I need a cold shower, because I know what my choice is even without thinking.

"Breakfast for the sweet lady who let me sleep in her bed," Loki says cheekily when I get out of the bathroom showered and dressed.

He pulls out my chair for me and I sit down, muttering. "And letting you stay in her home even though you show up in unexpected places in the middle of the night."

Loki pushes my chair in and leans over to whisper in my ear. "And for that I am eternally grateful." He's so close I can almost feel his lips brush against my skin, making every hair on my body stand up. Luckily he disappears to the bathroom after that, apparently he has eaten breakfast already. It's a simple breakfast, he had to make do with what he found in my cabinets, but it's nice anyway.

In the train on our way to headquarters normality has somewhat returned. At least, if you take in account the fact that I'm hyper aware of Loki's proximity in the rush hour train. Loki on the other hand acts like it is perfectly normal for me to being pushed into him every time the train takes a turn. Slowly, so he will not immediately notice, I start shielding off my powers from him. I don't want my powers to possibly push us into something we would regret later.

We discussed whether or not he should go with me to the Seneca casino. It could mean exposing him, yet it could also help in getting his memory back. We decided he would need a disguise, he can't show up in his armour or stylish black suit, being all Loki. Normally this would just mean he shapeshifts in whatever form is most suitable - the first time I saw him turn into a cat I almost choked on my coffee. Seeing Loki in jeans almost has the same effect. He has borrowed some clothes of the men who will go with us today; they were surprised, yet said nothing about the unusual request.

With the jeans, a dark T-shirt and the grey blazer he looks just mismatched enough to resemble a regular guy. Our pilot for today, an African-American woman named Monica Jones, hands Loki a pair of fake glasses with thin dark rims. "Here," she says. "Those have been in the cockpit forever, no idea where they came from." She watches him try on the glasses. "Why don't you just conjure up a disguise?"

Loki is quick to answer. "I am temporarily inconvenienced in the shapeshift department, this get up will do in the meantime."  
His reaction seems to satisfy her and she doesn't ask more. The three agents that go with us don't ask questions either. They're probably wondering why Loki doesn't use magic or why he is still here - he hardly ever lingers after a mission, unless it's needed.

Taking a Quinjet for what could possible be just a visit for an hour is a bit overdone, but it would be a six hour drive by car and deputy director Hill did give me free reign to solve this case. On the jet I read through agent Romanoff's report on her interrogation of Loki yesterday. It states his memory loss seems to be genuine and that bringing up his previous deeds here on Earth caused him visible discomfort. To my surprise he was also followed back to my home and the agent tailing him only left when I got home. That explains why I ran into agent Patel in front of my apartment building. In my email I find the memo informing me about that in advance, I probably overlooked it before going home. To be fair, I wasn't that sharp anymore at the end of the day.

By the time we reach Niagara Falls I have caught up with my email and the tactical plan is discussed with the team. Loki and I will meet up with the casino's chief of security, Joey Christopher, and the team will provide back up if necessary. They will probably be bored out of their mind, waiting for us.  
An Uber takes us from the local airfield to the casino, where we are led to a hallway with a waiting area by one of the hostesses. "Remember coming here?" I ask Loki quietly.

He shakes his head. "Not the tiniest bit. It must be a potent spell if it still works on me."

"Guess so. If it was a spell at all."

Our conversation is cut short by a woman who walks up to us. "Miss Frederikson? My name is Charmaine du Bois, Mr. Christopher was needed elsewhere and asked if I could see to your needs."  
I introduce myself to the woman and Loki does the same thing, giving her the alias we agreed on. It's easy to see his deep voice is music to her ears.  
"Miss Frederikson, Mr. Johnson, if you would please follow me." The woman goes in front of us, her hips swaying seductively in her pencil dress. I can't blame her; even though he is dressed down and wearing glasses, Loki has a certain charm that's hard to cover up. Oh well, as long as she helps us get what we want, she can ogle Loki all she wants.

In her office Miss Du Bois looks at me questioningly. "SHIELD wants access to our security tapes from wednesday night?"

"That's right. That's what I explained on the phone yesterday." I give her my most friendly yet professional smile.

"Surely you don't mind explaining to me why?" She has pressed her fingertips together in front of her chest, looking all business like.

"Something happened during a covert operation, we are investigating it and we need your security tapes for that."

"Ah yes," Miss Du Bois smiles affably. "The covert operation that you so conveniently forgot to tell us about in advance."

I mentally roll my eyes; that's what covert entails, you tart. I smile again. "We meant no disrespect, Miss. It was supposed to be a very simple operation, in and out. It had nothing to do with your casino or the Seneca Tribe. Our subject just happened to be in a gaming mood that night."

"Then why not simply tell us about it?" She's enjoying this too much to my like and I'm about to make a snappy remark when I realise she's only getting on my nerves because she keeps glancing at the God of Lies to my right. So much for letting her ogle Loki, I guess.

"There wasn't much time, Miss Du Bois," Loki answers for me. The way he says her name... it's like he's tasting every syllable. And it tastes  _good_. He proceeds to explain to her why we chose to keep it a secret. He's basically saying everything I said or would say, yet it sounds so much better coming from him. I can just see Charmaine du Bois soften up and before I know it she agrees to let us watch the footage from that night. We can't make copies, but this is a great start.

Miss Du Bois walks us to a surveillance room. I trail a little behind to update the team by text, while Loki is talking animatedly to his new friend. I focus on our surroundings instead. The whole casino is drenched in tribe symbols. From a stylized image of hills that runs along the corridor walls to modern paintings of abstract totem animals. You can't mistake who owns this hotel and casino. I found no evidence of disputes between the Seneca Tribe and SHIELD, Asgard or any other groups that dabble with the supernatural. As most Native American Tribes their grievances are mostly directed at the U.S. Government, to ensure their rights. I found nothing out of the ordinary.

The casino has state of the art surveillance. Miss Du Bois introduces us to a young man who will show us the desired footage. "I'll come back in an hour to see how you are doing. Meanwhile, I'll make sure someone comes by to bring you coffee or tea."

"Thank you, Charmaine," Loki says warmly. "You are being most hospitable." Oh, they're on first name basis now?

"Yes, thank you so much, Miss Du Bois," I add friendly. "You have been a great help."

"My pleasure," she answers with a smile that is solely for Loki. His own smile fades away as soon as she has left the room.

I already sat down next to the technician, who is searching for the requested footage. There are at least twenty screens in front of us, most of them streaming the live footage from the hotel lobby and the main entrance of the casino. Loki is standing behind my chair, his arms crossed in front of him; I can see his reflection every now and then in the tv screens.  
Meanwhile, Loki is visible on the screen too, dressed impeccably in a dark green suit with a black shirt. I point to the screen. "There, that's our agent. Can you please show me all you have on him?"

The technician nods and pushes some buttons. We get four different angles of the room on screen and we can follow Loki as he gets a drink and plays a little game of roulette. His target is also at the roulette table.  
Next to me, the security guy starts looking from the Loki on screen to the Loki behind me. "That's you, right?" he asks, his voice laced with suspicion.

Loki chuckles. "I wish! That's one of our special agents. He can look like anyone, at any time. Watch what he does next."

One second Loki looks like himself and suddenly there is a gentleman with short wavy hair and a three day stubble in his place. The suit is still stylish, yet the shirt has changed to white and the suit to a dark shade of blue. He cleverly made use of a pillar to change his looks undetected. There are some people who could have spotted him, like an old man in a wheelchair and his caretaker and a middle-aged couple sitting at a table, though I doubt they have seen a thing. If you don't expect to see it, you usually are blind to things like this.

The technician scoffs and pushes yet another set of buttons. A new image appears on screen and in this one you can see the blind spot Loki used. The guy freezes the image on the exact moment Loki shapeshifts. "There!" he says with triumph. "Can't have any blind spots in a casino."

"Of course not," I agree. "But the fact that our agent took on a different image is not what concerns us."

"Is it an illusion?" the technician asks curiously.

"Something like that," I confirm, trying to stay vague.

"Magical or man-made?"

"Would it make a difference?" Loki asks casually.

Now the technician remains vague; he just shrugs and rolls the footage again. When we get to the point where the disguised Loki picks his target's pockets, almost too fast for the camera to see, the technician makes some screenshots. "You don't think he will ever be allowed in here again, do you?" he says cynically when I ask why he does that. "Your agent is blacklisted. We don't want that kind of shit here."

Well, that was to be expected. Yet another casino Loki is no longer welcome at. "Fair enough," I answer. "Now can you please show me what happens next?"

Just like on our own footage we can see some security move to the main entrance of the casino, probably the reason Loki didn't use that exit. "Do you know why they're there?"

"I wasn't on duty that night," the technician replies. "I could check the log, but Miss Du Bois said only to show you the video footage."

That's a little setback, though hopefully the images will reveal enough. We follow Loki who moves to a double door in the back. "Where does that lead to?"

"It's a short cut to the hotel bar," the technician explains. "We use it for our main players, but they're always escorted by a hostess."

Sure enough a nearby employee goes up to Loki to talk to him. It's a man in his early fifties, dressed in the colours of the casino, his longer hair gathered with a leather string.

"Who's that?"

"Mr. Christopher."

"Your chief of security..." Well, what do you know?! This probably isn't a good sign, though the two men seem to talk amicably and Mr. Christopher invites Loki with a move of his arm to follow him through the double doors. The God of Mischief does it without any sign of alarm.

 

**Part 6**

 

"What do you mean, you can't show me the footage of that corridor?" I stare at the technician who turns his desk chair from left to right, drumming his fingers on the arm rest.

"This was all I am allowed to show you, Miss," he says for the second time. He has turned all the screens back to the live stream from the hotel and casino.

As if on cue, Miss Du Bois shows up again. "How is everything here?"

"Good, we're good," Loki answers, turning around to her. "It was really helpful, thank you again."

"It was my pleasure," she answers sweetly. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"I'd love to talk to your boss, Mr. Christopher, if that's possible?" I ask casually, even though I would rather march straight up to his office right away.

"I would have to see if he's available," she answers evasively.

"We're happy to wait, Miss," I say quickly.

"Very well," she answers. "Follow me." She directs us to another waiting area, in another generic corridor. There are no windows here, just doors to what are probably all offices. At the end of the hall is a door that opens to a locker room, a couple of staff members just came out of it. I guess it's time to change shifts.

"Excuse me, Charmaine?" Loki says before the woman leaves us. He holds up a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. "Is there somewhere I can have a smoke? I know it's a nasty habit, but..." He lifts his shoulders with a charming smirk.  
Miss Du Bois gestures for him to follow her to the end of the hall. Next to the locker room is an emergency exit. She pushes the door open; it leads to the roof of the lower part of the building at the back of the casino. There are some plastic chairs and an ashtray right around the corner; the staff uses this as a smoking spot too.

"You smoke?" I ask Loki when we are alone on the roof.

He turns the pack over in his hands, opening and closing the lid. "No. They're from that technician, they were in his coat pocket."

"Well, you smoke now," I answer quietly and nod subtly to the camera above the emergency exit. Loki nods and takes a cigarette out. Lucky for him this smoker keeps his lighter inside his pack of smokes.

"Dirty habit," he smiles as he lights up.

I shrug. "Nice to be outside, though." The edge of the roof is not far away to our left. I walk up to it and look down. We are four stories high, above a parking lot for the employees. I turn back to watch Loki. He's letting the cigarette burn up mostly by itself, his eyes wandering over the roof. Not much here but pipes and air conditioning units. Still, it's a nice change from that dark surveillance room. I think Loki felt cooped up too.

My earpiece crackles at the same time I spot movement behind Loki. "Watch out!" I cry and Loki turns just in time to see his assailant.

"Hydra!" agent Jones pipes up in my earpiece. "We're coming!"

Loki's attacker has some sort of stun gun that Loki quickly rips from his hands. I grab it while Loki ends the short struggle by throwing his assailant into the wall with a sickening crack. Just when I wonder where his buddies are, a helicopter rounds the building. We dive for the open door as Hydra opens fire.  
"Where?!" Loki asks as he kicks the door shut.

"Top roof!" I answer when agent Jones tells me she'll pick us up there. "Take out that chopper!" I instruct her as I follow Loki to the nearest stairwell. I hit the fire alarm on my way, we need to get the civilians out.

We're only two floors up when someone suddenly shoots at us from a lower floor. Cursing our lack of arms - what am I gonna do with a stun gun now?! - I run faster up the stairs, Loki close behind me. Another spray of bullets hits the walls, Loki pulls me down on the stairs for cover. "You okay?" he asks when he lets me go so we can run again.  
I don't have to answer, we just have to get out of here. If only he could teleport right now, that would be great.

We break into the next floor; we're sitting ducks in that stairwell! We will have to get our hands on some weapons. I grit my teeth when I realise how we'll have to do that. Loki knows it too.

I take the first one, tackling him as soon as he comes through the door. Loki does the same for the second attacker, who is warned as he sees his buddy crashing to the floor. Both men have automatic weapons, but they're not of much use in body to body combat. However, mine manages to get in a nasty blow at my eyebrow before I shove the stun gun at his throat. That shuts him up, perhaps permanently.

"You're bleeding." Loki eyes me worriedly.

"I'm all right," I answer, checking my newly acquired weapon. "You know how to use these?"

"Point and shoot," Loki answers, weighing the weapon in his hand. There is noise coming from the stairwell and we run through the hallway to find another way up to the roof.

Agent Jones tells me the chopper is taken care of. "But there are a number of Hydra agents in the building. We think eight to ten."

"Three are down," I answer. "You know if the service elevators still work?" Blood starts running in my eye and I use my sleeve to wipe it off. The fire alarm is still blaring.

Jones answers confirming. "South side of the main building. I'll be ready to pull you out."

Loki finds the elevator first, an abandoned utility cart in front of it. I hope Hydra didn't hurt any hotel guests or employees. The hotel has twenty floors, taking the elevator is a risk; someone is bound to notice. But running up all those stairs and getting shot at is not really an option either. We are outnumbered and although this feels like a rushed attack, our best course of action is to get out of here as soon as possible.

In the elevator I hold Loki off when he wants to inspect my hurt eyebrow. Instead, I look at myself in the polished metal walls and press my sleeve against the gash to stop the bleeding. Half of my face is red, I'm a bloody mess - literally.

"I'll be okay, really," I assure Loki who stares at me with his jaws clenched. "It's you they want, I think."

"Why do you think that?"

"The memory card you retrieved... You got in Hydra's way. Again. Maybe they messed with your memory, I don't know. But I guess they found out you're vulnerable, because here they are, guns blazing."

"You sure?" Loki looks at me questioningly. "How would they have found out?"

I shrug. "Hell if I know, I didn't stop to ask."  
The button three floors below our stop lights up. "Shit."

Loki shoots the first Hydra agent in sight, the two other thugs quickly hide around the corner. We make a dash for the nearest staircase, but we get split up as two other Hydra agents show up at the other side of the long hallway. I try not to worry about Loki's safety as I've got my own life to look after. It's a mad dash up the stairs and suddenly a sharp pain in my upper arm as a bullet grazes my skin. I shoot my first attacker in his knee and he loses his gun as he tumbles down the stairs. My own gun blocks suddenly, the whole thing is jammed. In the next moment the second Hydra agent jumps my legs and I slam down against the concrete landing between two floors.

My weapon is useless to fire with, yet I can use it to hit my attacker's gun out of his hand. We both struggle to reach it, though all I can do is push it further down the stairs, out of reach for both of us. There are sounds of fighting on the floor below, but I can't hear who it is. I can't get my hands on my attacker properly, he is covered by a ski mask and he wears gloves. Besides, he is a lot stronger than I am and I am hindered by the bullet wound in my arm and the blood that is streaming down my face again.

A hard hit with his elbow nearly crushes my windpipe, at least, that's what it feels like. My vision is getting black around the edges as the guy squeezes his hands around my throat, pinning my arms with his knees. I try to push him off with my legs, only to cry out when his knee crushes my wounded arm.

All of a sudden, Loki is there; his fake glasses long gone and his hair a mess. Something flashes and the next moment my attacker's arms go limp, releasing the pressure on my throat. Loki lifts him off me with the two daggers he jammed in the man's back, throwing him to the side like a piece of trash.

I scramble to my hands and knees, my chest heaving as air flows freely again through my raw throat. Coughing hurts like hell, but I do it anyway.

Loki helps me to my feet, holding me against him with one arm. "I've got you, love."

He has two daggers in his right hand, they look familiar. I point to his weapons, wanting to ask where those came from, but all I can do is croak out something that resembles 'where?'.

Loki scoffs nervously. "Would you believe me if I said they appeared out of thin air?" He turns them around in his hand, the blades red with blood. "They were just there when I needed them. Feels good though, better than that stupid gun."

"That's because they're yours," I whisper hoarsely.

Loki shushes me. "Let's get out of here, we'll talk later."

Suddenly the door bursts open and members of a SWAT team fill the stairway. We throw our arms up quickly, the movement making me wince in pain. We can forget about getting out of here fast, I'm already dreading the amount of paperwork this is gonna bring.

Several hours later the paramedics have tended to my wounds, the police has questioned me and I even got a meal from the hotel. They have freed up some rooms on the second floor for the police to do their investigation. Loki is in the hotel room next to me, we got separated as soon as we were in cuffs. Those cuffs are off now, yet I am still confined to this room.

I am happy to see Loki when he finally walks in to the room, followed by the police inspector that is in charge and director Fury. The director, the inspector and another detective that was with me start talking in hushed voices.  
We're both still wearing our blood stained clothes when he comes to sit next to me at the foot of the bed, though I couldn't care less about that when Loki puts an arm around me and leans in to kiss my temple. "They patched you up nicely," he says, "how are you feeling?"

"Sore, but I'll live," I answer, leaning in to him shortly.

"You're not shielding off anymore, that's good," Loki says quietly.

He's right. I'm a little too sore and tired to care about suppressing my powers. "You noticed?"

"Yes, of course. Why did you do it?" Loki gives me a stern look.

"I... I thought it would be better," I answer reluctantly.

"You were trying to keep me at a distance, weren't you? Don't do that again, Ylva. I don't like it when you're hiding." His whispered words resonate in my head.

"Hey! Lovebirds!" Fury's voice makes us look up. "Care to explain why there is a helicopter wreckage on the front lawn and several dead Hydra agents scattered throughout the building?"

When the other team members are present too, we can construct the complete picture. Loki and I took out eight agents - though Loki did more in that department than I did -, agent Jones shot the helicopter down and our team took care of the remaining two agents. The hotel and the casino will be cleared for business as soon as the damage is assessed and cleaned up. The team takes off to make sure we're ready to go soon.

"No civilians were hurt," director Fury says gravely when we are alone in the room again. "But that is the only upside to this whole disaster. I've got the police department and this hotel's management so far up my ass that I doubt I'll be able to sit this week."

"There's another upside," I pipe up. My voice is still rough from being strangled. "Show him, Loki." The God of Mischief obligingly makes a dagger appear and disappear in his hand.

Fury groans. "Oh great, those annoying daggers are back. Any more tricks?"

Loki frowns a little and a small green flame appears in the palm of his hand. "We're getting there, I think," he says, closing his fingers to snuff out the flame. "Some bits of memory too, nothing much yet. I guess it was the adrenaline of the fight."

"So Hydra did you a favour by coming after you?" Fury rubs his chin. "Doesn't make sense if they were the ones to rob you of your memory."

"I've got a theory on that," I tell the two men who look up surprised. "I don't think it was Hydra. The Seneca people are still true to their culture, they're even attributing powers to some of their elders. What if one of those elders was here wednesday night?"

"You're saying they did this to Loki?" Fury asks, narrowing his eye at me.

"Maybe. Joe Christopher should be able to tell us more."

While we wait for the chief of security to arrive - probably furious about what happened - I watch Loki who paces the room. He keeps opening and closing his hand, making a flame and putting it out again. He reminds me of a caged lion.

'You might want to do something about that. Boy isn't feeling too well." Fury looks at me, one eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry, sir?" I was a bit lost in blank thoughts.

"He looks like he needs a bit of your relaxing juju," Fury explains, getting up from his chair. "Do your thing. Hug him, kiss him, whatever you two do nowadays... I'm getting coffee."

I want to protest, though Fury is out of the door without listening to me. Loki barely looks up as the door shuts behind Fury, he is lost in his own restless thoughts. I cradle my wounded arm in the sling and walk up to Loki. He's staring out of the window, still playing his nervous game with the green flame. "Careful. You might set the curtains on fire with that."

Loki chuckles softly as he looks to his side. "I think we did enough damage for one day."

"Technically, that was Hydra's doing, but yes, I certainly had enough for one day." I meant it as a joke, though Loki's smile disappears as soon as it came and he turns to me.

His long fingers gently brush my throat. "It's already becoming a bruise," he says softly. "I hate that I'm the cause of that."

I catch his hand with mine, lowering them to our side, yet he brings them up again between us. "Don't you dare say it comes with the job," he warns me, shaking his finger at me while still holding my hand. "I will not hear of it!"

His firmness makes me laugh, even though it hurts my throat. Or maybe it's the nerves, because with Loki clutching my hand to his chest there really isn't much space left between us.

"I'm sorry about what happened to you, love," Loki says and he brushes my hair to the side before he leans in to kiss my brow, right next to the bandaid that covers the three stitches in my eyebrow.

"That's twice now, calling me 'love'," I blurt out as my stomach does somersaults.

It takes a second before comprehension flashes over his face, at the same time as lightning flashes outside, followed by thunder. Loki chuckles softly, rubbing his thumb across my hand. "I didn't realise we were keeping scores?"

My heart is hammering in my chest. Is he going to kiss me? Do I even want that? Who am I kidding, of course I want that! The thought of kissing him has helped me fall asleep on more nights in the past months than I dare admit to myself. Keep breathing, Ylva, keep breathing. "I guess we're even now?"

Loki's free hand traces my jawline, coaxing me to look up at him. "We're not even, love," he says in a voice that does things to my lower stomach, "not even close."

"What the hell!?" My cry startles Loki as much as the sudden sight of his brother outside the window scares me. Thor is grinning from ear to ear, standing on the tiny balcony.

Loki's reaction is to shove me behind him with one arm and to point his dagger at the suspected danger with the other. "Odin's beard!" he exclaims when he sees Thor, followed by some curses.

If it were up to me I would have pulled the curtains shut and continued where we left off; I am angry at myself for getting spooked so easily. Thor knows damn well that he was interrupting something, I can see it from his face. Yet I can't stay mad at him when he is clearly worried about my mangled throat, face and arm. The God of Thunder fusses over my wounds for a bit before he lets Loki bring him up to speed on what happened. Loki also explains my theory to Thor, about the Seneca Tribe possible being responsible for his memory loss. Thor seems to think it's plausible.

"Well, I sure would like to know what I did to piss them off like that," Loki says aggrieved.

Thor laughs heartily. "Oh, I can think of a number of things, brother! You being your usual self being one of them."

Loki frowns angrily at his brother and his frown turns into a pout when he sees I don't exactly disagree with Thor. "You too, huh?"

"Let's just say there were bets on how long I would make it as your handler when I first started," I explain with a smirk.

"Because I'm dangerous?" Loki looks genuinely put off by that and he eyes my injuries warily. He truly feels guilty about me getting hurt, yet to me he saved me.

I shake my head at him and lower my voice to an urgent whisper. "Hey, don't go there." I wish we were alone in the room again, not back to our original places of me sitting on the bed - I'd love to lie down by the way, I'm friggin' tired - and Loki pacing the room, with Thor in the middle.

Thor slaps him on the shoulder, hard enough to make a human man stumble, though Loki barely moves. "Because of your sunny personality, brother," he jests. "Who won the bet, Ylva?"

"He did, I think," I answer, pointing to Fury who has returned with a large paper cup of coffee. The lobby of the hotel has a small coffee shop; I guess they're almost ready to let the people back in the hotel if Fury was able to get some coffee there. Although, this is Fury, he'd make the coffee himself if he had to. He was also the only one who gave Loki and me more than a few months before another handler had to be assigned. I think his bet is still going actually, he gave us even longer than this.

"Mr. Christopher is on his way. Safe to say, he is livid about the destruction of his hotel," the director says, casually nodding to Thor. "Glad to see you could make it."

Well, at least someone is happy to see the God of Thunder.

The chief of security comes in on the heels of Fury, making a beeline for Loki. "You!" He shakes his fist at the perplexed prince of Asgard. Mr. Christopher looks a bit rough, I can imagine the past few hours have caused him a lot of stress. "I thought we made it clear we never wanted to see you here again!"

 

**Part 7**

 

I think all of us are equally flabbergasted by Mr. Christopher's remark, though the Native American man pays us no heed. He is standing before Loki, barking out a string of angry accusations. The man clearly knows who Loki is,  _what_ he is, yet he is not intimidated at all.

When Fury tries to step in to calm the man down, he gets verbally abused too. SHIELD has really done it in the eyes of Mr. Christopher, I don't think we can talk our way out of this.  
"One time wasn't enough for you people?!" Mr. Christopher is gesturing angrily at us all. "No, you had to come back and fuck my hotel up! Do you know how much bad press is caused by this?! Body bags on my front lawn! Hell, even your own people got hurt!"

Loki clenches his jaw so hard I'm afraid he'll break it. "You brought this upon yourself," he grinds out, clearly restraining himself. "You should not have messed with me!"

Finally, Thor steps in, placing his big bulk between Loki and the chief of security. I am projecting my powers as well as I can; it's hard, being tired, hurt and slightly groggy on pain medication. I close my eyes to concentrate better, focusing on sending out wave after wave of relaxing vibes.  
It takes a while before it works, before the men are listening to each other instead of just hurling accusations back and forth. I stop pushing out too abruptly and the sudden void takes my breath away. Everything goes black.

Loki is dabbing my neck with a cold washcloth when I open my eyes again. "Ah, there you are," he says quietly as I smile weakly at him. I'm lying on the bed, on my side.

Fury peers at me over Loki's shoulder, his face softening for a moment. "That's enough for today, agent Frederikson." I nod in agreement, it's not like I had any plans after this.

Behind Loki Thor and Mr. Christopher are having a discussion, probably about the man in the bloodied shirt - my blood and that of Hydra agents - that is making sure I am fully awake again. "You stay down now, okay?" he instructs me gently. His hand brushes my cheek as he takes the washcloth away. "You've done more than enough."

I feel a bit ridiculous lying on the bed while the men are discussing a few paces away. Though I guess I am to thank for the fact that they are talking instead of fighting; I have earned the right to lie down for a bit. I try to follow the conversation with my hazy brain. Loki is mostly silent and lets Thor and Fury do the talking. It's not like he can score any points with the Seneca man anyway. Thor has the best chance of appeasing Mr. Christopher and it seems like he is doing a good job at that. Basically it comes down to promising Loki will never ever come near Seneca territory again.  
"You have my word, Mr. Christopher, it will never happen again. I will personally make sure of that," Thor promises, like Loki is a 5-year old who has stolen some candy. The dark-haired brother keeps his face as blank as possible, only his slightly flared nostrils give away his emotions. 

"Now, I will be very happy to take Loki back to Asgard," Thor continues and my heart clenches for a second when he says that. "But I would prefer to do that with his memory restored. I think he has been punished enough by now."

"You saw today how Mr. Laufeyson becomes even more of a trouble magnet when he isn't quite himself," Fury adds without a hint of irony.  
I feel for Loki, who has no other choice than to swallow this all. The prince is a proud man and the last couple of days have been full of humiliating experiences; there is only so much he can stomach, amnesia or not.

There is some bickering back and forth before Mr. Christopher finally fully admits Loki's memory loss was at the hand of someone from the Seneca Tribe. "The use of magic on our soil was an insult to my people!" he spits at Loki.

I fear I will have to use my powers again, but Loki raises his hands in apology. "I meant no disrespect. I only came here to do a job, my magic is my way to do that."

Mr. Christopher huffs annoyed. "Please, you were just showing off. That job you speak of could have been done without magic."

"Perhaps," Loki answers stonily. "I can't remember why I did what I did that night, thanks to you."

"You insulted us," the chief of security repeats. "Wielding magic in the presence of Strong Bear is a punishable offence."

"I don't know who that is," Loki replies irritated.

The name sound familiar to me, I encountered it while doing research yesterday. Strong Bear is like their shaman, a revered elder, if not their most revered man. "The chanting bear," I whisper, just loud enough for both Asgardians to hear.

Fury looks over to me and I understand what he wants to know: did we know in advance about this Strong Bear? Did we know he was here and might take offence? I can't give him that answer: Barry was supposed to do the briefing, I only stepped back in at the last moment. I might have missed something, a gut-wrenching realization. Barry might have known, but why would he leave that info out? I prop myself up against the pillow so I can pay better attention.

"I take it this Strong Bear is the one who is responsible for Loki's current condition?" Fury asks matter-of-factly. Mr Christopher gives the tiniest nod. "Is he here?" Again a tiny nod "Then I suggest we get him right now to put an end to this drama," Fury concludes and his tone of voice makes it clear he wants no discussion.

Mr. Christopher is not immediately inclined to do as Fury says, yet after a couple of tense minutes he caves and pulls out his phone to make a call. Fury also makes a phone call, probably to his deputy director. It's a short conversation and his phone vibrates with a message a couple of moments later. He walks over to the bed to show me the text. We  _did_  know about the presence of Strong Bear, yet not until thirty minutes before the mission. My guess is I was already asleep by then; Barry was leading the mission, he should have known about it.

It's not long before there is a knock on the door and Mr. Christopher goes to open it. "Uncle," he greets our visitor with a respectful nod.

Strong Bear turns out to be a man of at least ninety years old, his face riddled with age lines. He is sitting in a wheelchair, a plaid with a pattern of green hills over his legs. A woman about my age, who pushes his wheelchair, accompanies him. Strong Bear might be old, his eyes still have a cunning gleam.  
I move to my feet to greet him politely, though he urges me to stay seated with a gesture of his hand. "Please, Miss, don't trouble yourself," he says with a voice that could easily be mistaken for that of a man in the prime of his life. "It looks like you had quite a rough day, I'm sorry to see you're hurt."

"Thank you, sir. I'll be all right though, I'm glad we were able to stop Hydra."

Strong Bear politely inclines his head at me and it is not before that, that he addresses the men in the room, Loki especially. "I should have known a child of chaos isn't stopped that easily."

"What did you do to me?" Loki demands, shaking off Thor's restraining hand on his arm.

"Teach you a lesson in humility," the old man answers coolly. "And send you home."

Loki huffs aggrieved. "Better ask for directions next time, because that was not h..."

"Home is where the heart is," Strong Bear interrupts him unfazed. I flash red instantly; Loki on the other hand becomes even paler than he usually is. Fury only raises his eyebrows, but Thor is not as good in hiding his amusement. His adopted brother shuts him up with one dark look though.

Loki's eyes glide over me, but I can't read him. He is angry, that much is clear. I can tell his patience is hanging by a thread. Thor knows it too, he is very much on alert.  
"Undo it!" the God of Mischief demands curtly.

Mr. Christopher and the young woman glare angrily at him, though Strong Bear shows a small smile at Loki's insolence. "I didn't hear the magic word," he says lightly.  
In other circumstances I would probably like Strong Bear; he is sharp and witty, with the looks of a gentle grandpa. Yet in this situation he is only pushing Loki's buttons and that is never a good idea. The God of Lies is practically vibrating with anger.  
The old man looks from me to Loki and back. "It seems like home wasn't that far away for you, was it?" he observes and both the girl and Mr. Christopher look to me.

The chief of security huffs. "Should have taken better care of her then."

"Enough!" Loki shouts furiously. His jaw ticks and his voice is strained. "You will never see me here again after today, that I can promise you. Now undo whatever supposedly clever incantation you put on me and I'll be on my way."

"You expect me to believe the word of the Trickster?" Strong Bear asks sarcastically.

"You have my word too," Thor says gravely.

That seems to be enough, the old man nods and Mr. Christopher and the girl take a few steps back. Fury does so too, only Thor stays within reach of Loki.

The God of Mischief focuses entirely on the old man, who has started mumbling in his native language. Gradually his voice grows stronger and the air in the room gets thicker. I can't help but feel awe for his powers and I'm not the only one. Even Loki shows signs of interest at this display of powers.

I wish he would show more interest in me, yet he has not looked at me anymore. What will happen when this is over? Will he remember what happened in the last couple of days when his memory is restored? Will everything go back to the way it was? Where does this leave us? Is there an 'us'?

There is so much magic in the air now I can taste it on my tongue. The old man seems to vibrate and shimmer. To my astonishment I can see the image of a brown bear around him. The chanting bear!  
Suddenly I have the feeling as if someone clenches down on my windpipe. Immediately I get a flashback to earlier this day, yet before my fight reflex kicks in the feeling is gone again. I think the others felt it too, Loki the most as he even staggers forward.  
The air clears and I think it is done. The God of Mischief leans with his hands on his knees for a moment, apparently needing the recovery.  
"You better keep your word, Trickster," Mr. Christopher says with a voice full of contempt. "Because the next time we won't be so lenient."

Two daggers flash when Loki straightens, his face contorted in a sneer, yet Thor is quicker. He simply snags Loki by the waist with his strong arms and busts through the balcony door. "Now, Heimdall!" he shouts and not a second later the rainbow lights of the Bifrost engulf both Asgardians and take them away. The balcony and part of the floor of the hotel room are scorched with the intricate pattern I know so well from the lawn outside SHIELD headquarters.

"Yeah, yeah, we'll pay for that," Fury says with a sigh to Mr. Christopher, who is so mad he can't speak anymore and only sputters at the sight of yet more damage to his hotel. "Come on, agent, we will leave too."

I follow the director to the back of the hotel, where the Quinjet is parked in the parking lot. "Where's Loki?" agent Jones asks curiously when we get in.

"Back to Asgard," Fury replies curtly and he takes a seat next to her in the cockpit.

I strap in in the back, leaning my head against my seat. Back to Asgard. For how long? I don't know why I expected Loki to come home with me at the end of this day. It seems silly now. Though who knows, maybe he'll be back soon. Thor probably only took him away to prevent further escalation.

I sleep for most of the flight, waking up when the Quinjet touches down. Deputy Director Hill is already waiting for us for debriefing. "You want to shower first?" she asks when she sees me. I'm still dressed in the bloodied pantsuit, one sleeve missing because the paramedics cut that off to treat the gunshot wound.

I glance down at my clothes, remembering how bad I look. "Maybe that's a good idea, madam."

"Ok. We'll start in twenty minutes."

Showering feels good. Clean clothes even better. Dressed in the standard issued black tracksuit from SHIELD I join my colleagues in the briefing room. On large screens against the walls is all the data from this mission. On one screen is a large picture of Strong Bear; his real name is Joseph Christopher. If you see his picture, you wouldn't suspect him to pack such a punch.

Barry and the rest of the team that was with Loki on wednesday night are here too. There is one seat left at the table; Barry pulls the chair next to him out for me. "They got you pretty good, are you okay?"

"Yeah. Loki was there to prevent worse," I answer as I sit down.

"If it wasn't for him it wouldn't have happened in the first place," Barry says, ignoring my dark look. "So, he really lost all his powers? I already thought something was off, he never hangs around here for that long."

"He still had all his powers, he only forgot how to use them," I answer coolly.

"That's just plain stupid," Barry snickers. "I bet you're glad he took the rainbow express home again. That guy always expects everyone to be at his beck and call all the time."

"Oh, just shut the fuck up, Barry," I sigh exasperated. I am not in the mood for this Barry - Loki rivalry, or whatever it is.

Deputy Director Hill leads the debriefing. First, we go over the mission of wednesday night again; I tell everyone how Loki showed up at my home to be briefed, while he was supposed to report to agent Luschek at headquarters. "He was early, so he stayed for a bit after briefing."

"What time did he leave?" Miss Hill asks me, checking the timeline.

"I don't know exactly, I was asleep when he left."

Barry turns to me with a confused frown. "You were asleep? What did you guys do?"

"Watch tv," I answer with a shrug. "I was sick and tired and I fell asleep. Loki left on his own accord."

"Agent Luschek? At what time did he report to you?" Deputy Director Hill forces Barry to stop staring at me.

"About two minutes before departure. I ran over the mission with him on the jet," Barry answers. 

"Did you tell him about Joseph Christopher, a.k.a. Strong Bear?"

Agent Luschek shakes his head. "One more member of the Seneca Tribe present at the casino didn't seem like a problem. Loki wouldn't be dealing with them." He nudges his chin to the screen at the wall. "Why is grandpa up there anyway? He's in a wheelchair and he's ancient."

"Grandpa can wield powerful magic," Director Fury speaks up and Barry pales as he realizes he made a mistake.

"That wasn't in his file..." he gulps.

"No," Deputy Director Hill states coolly. "But it did say he is the most important figure in the Seneca Tribe. Didn't you think that was worth mentioning? Loki could have stayed out of his way more if he knew." She presses a button and one of the screens shows Loki shapeshifting at the casino. Now I've met Strong Bear, I see him immediately in the corner of the screen; Loki magically changed forms almost right in front of the old man! Another button and the video shows the old shaman is wheeled through the doors in the back, mere moments before Mr. Christopher talks to Loki. I totally overlooked him the first time I saw the images; who is gonna notice an old man in a wheelchair?  
"Turned out he was worth mentioning," Miss Hill says, pausing the screen at the image of Loki going through the doors with Mr. Christopher. It looks like the casino has handed over the security tapes after all.

"What was I gonna say?" Barry exclaims. "Watch out for the ancient guy in the wheelchair? Loki would've laughed at my face!"

I have to admit that might be true. Without knowing his true potential, Joseph Christopher doesn't seem that much of a threat.

We go through the whole affair, bit by bit, until it is just me and my bosses in the room. The whole thing was a cluster fuck, from beginning to end. We're not even sure how or why Hydra showed up! Because there were very little people who knew what was the matter with Loki, a mole seems farfetched. It is more likely Hydra had someone in place at the casino, who saw Loki in his unusual get up and drew conclusions. Their attack was very unorganized and we're pretty sure it was a last minute kind of affair. Something they probably came to regret.

"So... home is where the heart is, huh?" Fury is casually turning his chair from left to right, watching me observantly.

"I was just as surprised as you, sir," I answer quickly. Because I was, I really was. And I'd love to talk to Loki about it. Or not, depending on how embarrassing that will be. It is already embarrassing enough in front of my superiors.

"Surprised? I wasn't surprised!" Fury chuckles.

"I thought you two were dating," Maria Hill adds, "you know, since that..."

"That charity gala, yes," the director chimes in and I can feel my ears turn warm and red.

"So you and Loki are not romantically involved?" My Deputy Director seems genuinely puzzled.

I shake my head. "No. Just working together. Besides, isn't dating your co-worker kinda against the rules?" I can't believe I'm having this conversation!

Fury shrugs. "If it would mean keeping Loki compliant I have no objections. You were doing a great job at keeping him in check, save for the lava-incident." I get a stern look for that. "He listens to you, more than to anyone else. You have a way with the God of Mischief."

"I don't know if I still have after this," I say quietly. I feel like things have changed. Irreversibly.

"We'll see. For now, get yourself a ride home," Hill instructs me. "And take up those sick days for real now."

 

 

 

**Part 8**

 

I sleep like the dead for seventeen hours. When I finally wake up a small part of my brain expects - no, hopes - to find Loki next to me in bed, though rationally I know that was a different Loki. I don't even know if he remembers everything that went on when he wasn't in his right mind. Who knows, maybe to him it is like nothing happened! I don't think that really is the case, but until I talk to him my brain plays one hypothetical scenario after the other.

In the bathroom I give myself a scare when I look in the mirror: my throat is black and blue and so is the general area of my split eyebrow. I look like I've been through hell, even though it could have been far worse. Dressing myself is a bit painful because of my arm, though again, it could have been far worse than just a flesh wound.

I spend the next couple of days in bed and on my couch, ordering food in and binge watching Netflix series. I stay away from Orange is the new black, even though there is a brand new season waiting for me. I think about Loki enough already as it is, I don't have to be reminded about the dark-haired man who shared this couch with me. And my bed, although I was asleep for most of that. I miss having him around, it was nice. It felt strangely normal to share my days with the prince of Asgard.

The picture of us at the gala has found its way from my dresser to my nightstand. The memory of dancing with him that night plays over and over in my mind. Looking back, I don't think I fell for him in the past week, I already fell for him on that dance floor.  
I am waiting for him to show up at my door. Sometimes I have the feeling he's standing right behind me, though he is never there when I turn around. At first, I believe Loki will return to me as soon as he can. But after four days doubt sinks in. I haven't heard from him; no phone call, no text message, nothing. Surely he would have contacted me by now?

When I return to work another couple of days later - not yet cleared for field duty - I am confronted with Loki in the stack of paperwork that is waiting for me, yet the real God of Lies is nowhere in sight.

The night I get home from my first day back at work I decide I'm going to call Loki myself. After all, I have his number, why should I wait for him to contact me? I get my phone out and scroll through my contacts until I get to the L. My finger hovers over his name. You know what? I'm gonna make myself some dinner first!

What if I imagined all the chemistry between us? Maybe he was only this familiar with me because of my powers. It wouldn't be the first time for that to happen; there's a reason why I never had a relationship that lasted longer than a couple of months. If you spend enough time with me, you develop some sort of immunity for my powers; at least for the normal dose I am broadcasting in everyday situations. My family wouldn't have a life otherwise! It is a good thing, because I don't have to shield off all the time when I'm around people from my inner circle. It has killed some relationships in the bud though, when the mutual attraction turned out to be fueled by my powers.

Something I always liked about Loki is that he never really seemed that influenced by me. However, I know now he  _does_  feel my powers; he even likes it and doesn't want me to shield off. Yet what do I gain from that knowledge when he disappears to Asgard without a word?

I should call him, I really should. As his handler and friend from work I have good reason to. I don't necessarily have to talk about that time he slept in my bed or that time we almost kissed, or when he called me 'love', or that time we hugged and I almost didn't want to let him go.  
On the other hand, I can make myself a cup of tea first. Taking a shower is nice too.

It's not until I am dressed for bed, late that evening, that I finally have the guts to press 'call'. The line makes a weird static noise, I guess that's caused by trying to connect to another realm. I have no idea what time it is on Asgard, maybe I'm calling at the wrong hour and it's the middle of the night over there. I usually only text Loki, telling him the time and place to be briefed for a new mission. A female voice suddenly speaks up. "The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable." Fucking great.

The next day I try calling again, trying not to overthink it, but again I can't reach Loki. Either his phone isn't working or the magical reception is messed up. I decide to send a text, hoping he will read it soon.  _'Call me, please. X Ylva'_

Trying to put him out of my head for now, I concentrate on my work. I'm not cleared for field duty until my arm is fully healed, so I work at International Operations for now. My days are filled with organizing the odds and ends for other people's missions. I sit in an office with three other agents and the whole day there are people walking in and out to ask for things or to pick up or bring paperwork. As far as desk jobs go, it's quite all right; lots of social interaction with people I already knew and new ones.

One day, agent Romanoff walks in to arrange some things for a mission that takes her abroad. While she waits for my colleague to get her some things, she perches on the edge of my desk. "How's Loki?" she asks casually.

"I wouldn't know," I answer with a pang of regret mixed with anger.

"Really? You haven't talked to him since?" Natasha Romanoff looks genuinely surprised.

"Nope," I reply, letting the p pop.

"You didn't want to, or..." Her question is quiet and careful as she is gauging my reaction.

I lean back in my chair, pushing myself off my desk. "His phone doesn't work, I tried. Haven't heard from him or seen him. As far as I know, he's on Asgard."

"No mission for him?"

I shake my head. "Fury has suspended him for now. Although I guess Loki doesn't know that yet."

Agent Romanoff chuckles. "He'll turn up eventually, wondering why we haven't called him in for help."  
Knowing Loki, that could be true. He works for SHIELD as a way to pay off the New York debacle, though I know he also likes the fact that there are certain jobs only he can do. Like everyone, he enjoys being needed.  
That said, I would hate it when he only shows up to check why we haven't called for him. It's been almost two weeks now and I'm getting more and more pissed at him. No matter how much he remembers from those days he spent at my home, no matter what it meant to him, contacting me to say thank you would be the decent thing to do!

Besides, everybody expects us to be in contact. Even Fury asks me if I have talked to Loki yet when I drop off some paperwork at his office. It's embarrassing to talk to my boss about stuff like this, because he's not only asking me this as Loki's handler, he also knows there is - or was - something more. Hell, he even thought we were doing something more than just working together for months already!

At the end of a long day, after having to tell two different people 'I don't know' when they ask where Loki is and telling Barry to take a hike when he asks me to go for a drink with him for the umpteenth time - maybe that was uncalled for, but after two and a half weeks of waiting for news from Loki my mood is the opposite of sunny -, the culprit suddenly shows up in the door to my office.

"Hey, do you know why my badge says I'm suspended?" Loki asks curiously, showing me his lanyard. "I had to threaten the guard to let me in."

I stare at him, my feet nailed to the ground. We're the only two people in the office space, my colleagues all left to either get dinner in the cafeteria or go home. Loki looks the same as he always does; a dark suit that fits him like a glove, black hair combed back and a devilishly handsome smirk on his face.

"Hi, love, how are you? I came to get my phone charger, my phone is dead." He shows me the white cable in his other hand before pocketing it. "Didn't think I would see you here, thought you would still be on sick leave." He babbles on while I still stare at him. I can't believe my ears! How can he talk to me like that?! Like nothing happened! Like it's been two days instead of over two weeks!  
"I was actually coming to see you after my stop here, but then I heard you were in the office." He watches me walk up to him, his face relaxed and welcoming and his arms opening up to me.

His expression changes quickly when I start shouting at him. "You little shit! Where have you been!? Do you think that you can just show up here like nothing happened?!" I am furious; all my relief from seeing him turned into liquid fire and it's pouring over now. I swat his hand away when he tries to touch me. "No! It's been two and a half weeks, you asshole! You just disappeared! After everything I have done for you!" The liquid fire finds its way to my eyes in the form of hot tears. I jab my finger in his chest. "That is not okay!"

He tries to grab my arm when I push past him, though he doesn't pursue me when I pull myself loose and storm off to the elevators. Those treacherous hot tears run down my cheeks, over my clenched jaws. I angrily wipe the tears away before the elevator doors open and I hurry out the building, to the streets, to the train station.

In the train I stare out the window, calming down a little. I'm more sad than mad now. It was a shock to see him all of a sudden, after waiting for what felt like an eternity for him to contact me. Maybe I shouldn't have stormed off like that, but that's done now. And I feel like I have the right to be angry at him; who waits over two weeks after something like that happened?!

Just like almost three weeks ago there is a dark figure waiting for me by the door to my apartment at the end of the hall. Although now he's leaning against the door post instead of sitting on the floor like the lost puppy he was last time.

I slowly walk up to him, stopping a few feet away. Loki shows an apologetic smile and when he turns his hand there is a green shimmer, revealing a bouquet of flowers. "Maybe I should have started with these," he says with a hint of a smile in his voice.

"Yeah, you should've," I answer slowly, eyeing the flowers. They're not from Earth, some of them look like peonies, but they're not. Others resemble roses, yet I'm pretty sure those didn't grow in a greenhouse near here.

"From mother's garden," Loki explains when he sees me looking. "Do you like them?"

It is the most gorgeous bouquet I ever saw. I nod. "They're pretty."

Loki takes a step towards me and holds out the flowers to me. "Can I come in, Ylva?"

 

**Part 9**

 

We don't say anything; Loki watches me put the flowers in a vase - the only one I have, I am grateful my grandmother insisted on giving me one when I started living on my own - and he is still silent when I carry the vase to the table. The bouquet is so beautiful, with flowers in various shades of pink and purple, mixed with whites and greens. I turn back to Loki and lean against the table. "Thank you for the flowers," I tell him. "They're lovely."

"They're not just to say I'm sorry," he says earnestly. "They are more to say thank you." He closes the distance between us to take my hand. "Thank you for helping me, for taking me in."

"You're welcome," I tell him, pulling my hand out of his to rub my neck. My mind is a mess, I have no idea what to do. "Why didn't you call?"

"Dead battery," Loki shrugs, though his eyes look intently at my face as if he's searching for something. His talk is casual, yet his gaze isn't. "Left my charger in my coat, which was in my locker at SHIELD's. They don't sell iPhone chargers on Asgard."

"You could have come back earlier, you know. It's been two and a half weeks." I cross my arms in front of my chest and glare at the prince of Asgard.

He ignores my glare and puts his hands on my upper arms, gently rubbing his thumb across my uninjured arm but keeping his hand still on the other. "I realize that now. I'm sorry, I meant to be here sooner." He is silent for a moment, biting his lip. "Time is... different on Asgard. It feels different." He brings a hand up to cup my cheek. "I could give you a lengthy explanation, thought it just comes down to this: I wanted to come back, to you, but there was a hold up. And before I knew it too much time had passed."

My cheek is burning under his hand and even though I want to avert my eyes I can't; he's keeping them locked in his gaze. His other hand moves from my arm to my waist, gently pulling me against him. I uncross my arms and place my palms against his chest, still unable to look away from him. He leans in and brushes his nose against mine. "Do you think you can forgive me for being late?" he says softly.

I nod slowly and swallow hard; my heart is racing in my chest. "How... how much do you remember?" There. The million dollar question.

A smile spreads over Loki's features. "Everything, my love."

Those three little words make my stomach flip. I lift my face a little and carefully touch his lips with my own. His mouth is warm and gentle, our lips fitting together with ease. Loki's hand moves from my cheek to my neck, his fingers gliding through my hair.  
We take our time, exploring, tasting, feeling. I don't think I've ever been kissed like this; this gentle, this slow. He holds me against him like he can hold me forever and I want to be held forever.

It's not after forever though that we break apart, yet it has left my lips red and puffy and there is a permanent blush on my cheeks. Loki nudges my nose with his and smiles. "I've been wanting to do that for a while," he says and pecks my lips again. "Maybe I should have done it sooner."

"No, this is good like it is," I argue with a small shake of my head.

Loki clasps his hands together behind my back and looks down at me with a smile. "So, what now?" he asks playfully. "Netflix and chill?"

I almost snort with laughter and push against his chest. "How about Netflix and Thai food?"

"As long as it's with you," Loki answers, only partly joking.

Some time later the new season of Orange is the new black is playing and my coffee table is filled with empty white paper containers from my favourite Thai restaurant. Loki sits on the floor again - he really dislikes my worn-out couch -, turned to me, with his arm draped over my lap. We are not seeing much of the show; we're too busy gazing at each other.

"You know," I say slowly, running my hand up and down his arm. "Fury thought we were dating."

Loki snakes his hand under my shirt, his fingers warm against my side. "Really? For how long?"

"Since that charity gala," I reply. "The one in Chicago."

Loki hums appreciatively. "You were stunning in that gold dress."

"Is that why you insisted on dancing with me?" I lean forward to kiss him.

Loki meets my lips and wraps his arms around me to pull me from the couch into his lap. "It was the perfect excuse to hold you in my arms."

So I guess it wasn't my imagination that night, when I thought Loki was holding me a little closer and longer than necessary. My thoughts about that dance, feeling like we were the only ones on the dance floor, dissolve when Loki kisses me again. He tastes like the spicy food we shared together and something more. Something promising. The God of Mischief softly bites my lip, then licks it with the tip of his tongue, seducing me to let him in. I let him, quickly changing my seating so I straddle his legs and put my arms around his neck. His hands slide under my shirt again, stroking my back in slow, warm movements. The tv is long forgotten.

We take it slow, Loki follows my lead as if he doesn't want to rush me into things. He's sweet, gentle and very, very enticing. It doesn't really take long for me to want more of him, all of him. When I show him that, the God of Mischief delivers on his name and magicks my jeans and shirt away. He makes me lean back on his lap, caressing my skin. "You're even more beautiful than I imagined," he says softly.

I thank him with a kiss that deepens quickly. He teleports us to the bedroom, an astonishing experience that is soon forgotten because of the magic that follows. It is amazing; I feel loved, desired and most importantly, I feel completely at ease with him. In the dusk of my bedroom there is no me, there is no him, there is only us.

 

***

 

I cling to him on his lap, slowly catching my breath. Loki snuggles me lazily, burying his face in my neck. "Now you are truly forgiven," I chuckle lightly, shrieking shortly as he pinches my side in response.

He kisses my neck, holding me tight. "If this is your way of forgiving me, I will make you mad more often." 

I grab a handful of his hair and pull, resulting in Loki throwing us both on the bed in a laughing pile of limbs.

Some time and a shared shower later we're back in bed, snuggling under the covers. Loki has pulled me against him, spooning me and absentmindedly running a hand along my skin. "I was of a mind of doing this when I was in your bed the other week," he says in a low voice, "but I couldn't remember what it was like between us before."

"You didn't know if it was okay to seduce me?" I fill in for him, turning my head a little to Loki.

His lips catch my ear before he answers. "Sort of, yeah."

I smile. "Yet you had no trouble climbing in my bed when I was asleep."

Loki firmly takes hold of my ass, pushing his hips against me. "Can you blame me?" He moves back to the lazy bear hug, seemingly tired and content, and kisses my jawline. "You are sweet, you're gorgeous and you stand your ground. What's not to love?"

My heart skips a beat at the mention of the L-word. I catch his lips with mine, answering without words.

The next morning Loki makes me breakfast again, after trying to convince me to stay in bed for the rest of the day. He makes a good case, yet I manage to keep my head on the right way. Fury may be turning a blind eye to me dating Loki, I am sure skipping work for sex is not permitted.

Loki comes with me to work; riding the train with paper cups of coffee in our hands seems to be a repeating thing for us. Although I must say it is much more enjoyable now I can just hold on to Loki in the crowded train instead of desperately trying to avoid touching him.

When SHIELD HQ comes in sight at the end of the street, he removes his arm from around my shoulders. "I guess you want to keep it professional at work?"

I look up to him to see if that bothers him. "Yes... I mean, it is work."

He smiles reassuringly and leans in for a last quick kiss. "I'll follow your lead, Little Wolf. Just let me know when you're up for a quickie in the coat room." He laughingly ducks away from my swatting hand.

Security gives Loki trouble again because his badge says he is suspended and is not supposed to be here. "Come on, MacKenzie, you know who he is," I call over from the scanner that X-rays my bag. "He's with me, you can let him in."

Agent MacKenzie lets Loki pass and the God of Mischief slings an arm around my neck, all not so subtle Loki charm. "I'm with you, Wolfgirl?"

I could have known he would be giving me a hard time, just to have some fun. "Yeah, yeah, Prince Charming, you can dial it back a notch."

We go to Fury's office first, who clears Loki for duty after a stern talk about showing off on the job. I stay out of it mostly, only answering when a question is asked. And I certainly don't react when Fury asks Loki if he needs to assign a different handler. "Your handler is your first line of contact. You need to talk to her, not disappear for weeks without a word! If this doesn't work for you, I'll need to assign a different agent to you."

Loki answers without his usual arrogance. "No, it will not happen again." He looks over to me, a small smile playing on his lips. "I like this one, I want to keep her."

Fury dismisses us after that and we get up to leave his office. My boss smirks at me as I walk through the door. "You've got him whipped good, don't you?"

I try to pawn it off with a casual shrug, despite the blood that rushes to my face. And of course, Loki makes it worse. "Whips? Nah, I wouldn't want to mess up that perfect rosy skin." He smirks devilishly. "Now, cuffs, those might be an option!"

 

 

***

**Author's Note:**

> Curious to the story of the mission with the gold dress? You can find it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17764922/chapters/41917235


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